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I need a plan for a first date.

Tagged as: Dating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (24 August 2012) 3 Answers - (Newest, 25 August 2012)
A male United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I recently went out on a date with a girl who's number I got at a local coffee shop. It wasn't anything crazy, just a casual late lunch at this bar and grill place (which is good because she said she doesn't like fancy restaurants). It went really well, we hung out for a bit afterwards. It was our first time hanging out, so we didn't kiss or anything, just got to know each other. I'm really into her, she's exactly the type of girl I'm into, I just really am not good at this dating thing, but I really want to go about this the right way. There's a party at my friend's house this weekend, should I invite her? Or should I try something more along the lines of dinner and a movie on Sunday? Please help! She's really great, and I just don't want to screw this up!

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A female reader, katiekate United States +, writes (25 August 2012):

katiekate agony auntI think it'd be fun to invite her to a party. What kind of party is it? If drinking is involved, just make sure you take it easy on the alcohol. Mingling with people and casually meeting some of your friends would probably make her feel good! I think it would demonstrate that you're into her, but not going overboard about it, you know? If you take her to the party, make sure you focus on her- don't just leave her alone for long periods of time or anything like that. Introduce her to people, make sure she's comfortable, and if you sense she's ready to leave, offer to take her for a bite to eat or a late movie, or something like that. I think you should go for it. Good luck!

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A female reader, k_c100 United Kingdom +, writes (24 August 2012):

k_c100 agony auntI personally would feel a little uncomfortable going to a party on a second date, you might be moving a bit too fast for her by introducing your friends to her already. Your first few dates should be just the two of you rather than in a big group of people so you can get to know each other.

The cinema is also a bit risky because you cant talk much - so I would suggest another dinner, or if you are both old enough drinks in a nice bar (not too noisy though!). If the weather is good a picnic is really cute, you could take her someone nice and take a picnic with you so you can spend some quality time alone. Other date ideas could be taking her to the zoo (girls love that kind of thing), going for a walk, invite her round for dinner and cook for her (only once you have been on at least 3 dates though), theme parks (the queues are great for talking!), ice skating....try and think of any hobbies or interests she has talked about and see if you can incorporate them into a date.

My boyfriend took me to a bird sanctuary where they have penguins when we first started dating after I had talked about how much I love penguins, it was such a cute date and I really loved it. It will impress her if you have listened to what she was talking about and planned a date around that.

Most of all - relax, and dont try too hard to impress her. If she has agreed to a second date then she clearly likes you, so unless you do something stupid like try and grope her in the cinema (I'm sure you wouldnt!) then you cant go too wrong.

Good luck!

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A male reader, DoubleM United States +, writes (24 August 2012):

DoubleM agony auntPersonally, I prefer dates during which I can talk with the date. You can't do that very well during a movie. Dinner or lunch dates work better to get to know someone, in my opinion. It does not need to be fancy.

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