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I miss my fun nights out and my friends...what happened to the man I fell in love with?

Tagged as: Dating, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (3 August 2011) 2 Answers - (Newest, 3 August 2011)
A female age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I need advice with my relationship please! I started going out with my boyfriend 5 months ago and although I love him a lot, I'm already growing frustrated with how he acts sometimes.

The man I fell in love with was fun, cheeky and loved going on nights out with friends.It was one of many traits that I loved about him.

However, ever since we started going out, he doesnt drink much and moans when we are on a night out. At 18 I've only just started going out to nightclubs and already I feel like I've had to sacrafice my weekends of having a little fun after a long week. If I drink, he moans and goes into a jealous huff if any guy gives me attention even though I never ever encourage them, I simply ignore them because im happy. However it is never good enough for him. He falls out with me and makes me feel like its my fault.

I gave up having fun nights out, leaving early and only drinking water but I'm beginning to miss my friends and when I watch them have fun I feel miserable.

Is there any way I can persuade him to have more fun? I miss the man I fell in love with 5 months ago and I feel like im too young to sacrafice having some fun in my weekends.

ps, I should probably mention he is 19 so he isnt growing out of nightclubs etc.

thanks x

View related questions: fell in love, jealous

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A female reader, angelDlite United Kingdom +, writes (3 August 2011):

angelDlite agony auntit is hard to comment on his behaviour coz there is two sides to every story.

maybe when you are out and having a drink with friends you get too loud, too flirty, get too much attention from other men, drink too much and get silly, maybe your friends are the sort who encourage all this and he thinks they are a bad influence who will lead you and your relationship with him into trouble.

or maybe you are none of the above things and he is just someone who is very insecure, lacks confidence and hence feels like he needs to keep you too close to him or you will leave him for something better.

you will need to have a good talk about this to him coz he is the only one who knows WHY he is behaving the way he is. whatever his reasons though, its seems like you and he have not got compatible personalities, it is only now, 5 months in that you both are starting to see each the problems in each other

x

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (3 August 2011):

maybe invite your mates and his mates over and have a fun night in?see if he lets you drink when there are no strange men around.And just get tipsy,not absolutely smashed-maybe you drink a lot and he's concerned about your health,or maybe your a bit wild and difficult to handle when you're drunk-he might be scared somebody will take advantage of you or he could be a bit embarrassed as well

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