A
female
age
26-29,
*ySweetheart9113
writes:Ok, so I posted on here not to long ago but I seem to be having a problem... A few months ago, back in september, around my fiance and i's anniversary, I caught him online talking to other women, calling them beautiful, making sexual remarks and other things. I love him so much it hurts but now every time he goes to do something, I feel like hes going to meet up with someone or talking to someone. He always asks why I have an attitude when he goes to do somethings and its because I simply don't trust him. We do live together right now but I have been wanting to buy a house recently and due to his mean personality and him simply being his controlling/bi-polar self, he assumes that if something happens between me and him that he will get to keep that house and the vehicles, all three of which I pay for and are in my name and has nothing to do with him. I feel like he is always hiding something from me and am afraid that I will end up snapping on him one day if I come home and has someone there I don't like, considering that it is my house. I don't want to live by myself but I don't want to have someone live off of me and take advantage of me. I can't move back in with my parents because I can't handle being told what to do after being used to doing whatever I feel like. I love this man more than anything but I just don't trust him.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2016): I totally agree with Honeypie he is using you. Your love of him is not returned. If you stay with him you will only suffer and end with a broken heart. Get rid of him. There are plenty fish in the sea.
A
male
reader, Been there Now over it +, writes (18 January 2016):
First things first...DO NOT give this guy money, cars or put him on the title of any house you buy. Not even if he pays part of the cost. This guy is just bad news and you are likely to lose any money you spend in these directions. As for the future: DO NOT marry a man who is flirting with and making sexual remarks to other women behind your back.DO NOT marry a man who is controlling/bi-polar and has irrational ideas that things you pay for are his if you split. DO NOT marry a man who lives off of you and takes advantage of you!Really, don't you think you deserve better? Doesn't what I say make sense? I am not sure why you love this person more than anything." It doesn't make sense and that is the real mystery here. How would you advise a friend if she was in your same position? Romantic situations are usually at their best during the engagement stage...this deal will become worse as time goes on, especially if you get married and he feels he has even more control over you.Your best bet is to move away from him, whether it is by yourself or with a roommate.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (18 January 2016):
Kick him out and find a room-mate! Preferably female.
He is taking full advantage of you and I think you know it. And engagement or even marriage won't change the fact that me is cheating on you, maybe not physically, but emotionally.
If you PAY for the car HE drives, you SELL or find a way to get rid of that cost. If you owe more than yo uget get for it, here is a good link:
https://www.daveramsey.com/blog/how-to-sell-an-upside-down-car
Why on EARTH should he get the car if it's in YOUR name and YOU make the payments? I bet he presumes this because he thinks you rather be with him no matter how crappy he treats you than be alone.
WHY on EARTH should he get to stay in a house YOU are paying on? If it's a rental, are you both on the lease? If not, only you are on, you NEED to file for an eviction notice and kick him out (if he refuses to go willingly) same goes if you are the owner (with or without mortgage).
If you are BOTH on the lease, either FIND a new place - TAKE yourself off the lease and move or... again.. kick him out.
THAT last thing you should do is marry him. Because THEN the things you own will be his and his will be yours, that includes debts and house/car/etc.
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