A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I've been in love with my older brothers best friend for quite some time now. He will be a senior and i will be a sophmore. He's been a little flirty lately but not enough to say that he feels the same way I do about him. My brother won't give me a clear answer about if it would be weird if I dated one of his friends. I don't feel comfortable telling my brother about my secret crush. But out flirting has made it obvious. I had my sister talk to my brother for me and apparently my crush has too much respect for my brother too date me. That's the only information that he has said to my brother. So does that mean he likes me? Or since he's has so much respect for my brother, is it too weird for him to like me? Also, do you think our age difference is too much for him and I to like eachother?
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female
reader, Dionee'  +, writes (7 August 2013):
 Well, think of it like this:
he dates you something goes wrong you guys have a terrible break up you hate eachothers guts your brother is nolonger his friend because of your relationship they don't talk anymore STRANGERS.
I'm not saying that that's what's going to happen but if it were to happen what then? if things turn sour between the two of you then their friendship is affected.
You should leave it alone. It's not the greatest option for him to date you right now.
However, it's ultimately up to the two of you.
Goodluck
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 August 2013): It is likely your brother has already said "hand's off!"
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (7 August 2013):
 I agree with Tisha 100%.. IF he really IS interested he will make a move, if he was just being polite he won't.
I would suggest you turn down the flirting.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 August 2013): Brothers know the behavior and how our friends treat girls.
It's part of the "Guy Code" not to date too close to home.
When it comes to being close friends, it's almost like family. Blood is thicker than water; so if he hurts your sister, you might lose a friend. She comes first.
Not to mention, your parents lay the burden of your safety and protection on your brother's shoulders. You expose your family to the people you bring home. You are instantly responsible for what they do. Let's not forget that folks.
Girls feelings can be all over the place. Most teen crushes fade.
Nothing to be too concerned about; but they can cost a good friendship, if the dude is out of line. That's part of being a girl; and they like complicating things where guys are concerned. Girls send guys pics these days; even when not asked. They aren't always innocent. They may not end up in the right places. Not to mention rumors and gossip from girls that don't like you.
If you get jealous or have a spat with your brother's friend, he is forced to take sides. I never liked the idea; but never got in way, when my sisters flirted with my friends. I did keep a close eye on how they were treated.
I don't like the idea, because girls as young as 16-17 get hurt too easily. However; I don't care what other aunts say, it is partially the brother's say when she is so young.
If you're 18 or older; he doesn't have one solitary word to say about it. You make your own choices at that age, and date whomever you please.
Unless he has a violent reputation; or a criminal record. I'd talk some sense into you. He wouldn't be around you too long. He'd magically disappear.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (7 August 2013):
 Ah, the crush on the friend's older sibling. It's extremely common and perfectly natural.
So, how close a friend is he to your brother? Because if he decides to date you then he'll have to account to your brother. That's not comfortable for most guys and so basically you are asking him to choose between you and your brother.
Of course you can like one another. The real question is whether or not it goes beyond that.
If this nearly senior really wanted to date you then nothing much would get in his way. It sounds more like you are on the one with the crush and he's just okay with it.
I'd let it go for now, he knows, your sister knows, your brother knows…. if he wants to date you then the ball is in his court….
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