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I love my bf so much but I am attracted to his best friend, too! What should I do?

Tagged as: Dating, Friends, Three is a crowd<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (16 October 2006) 3 Answers - (Newest, 1 September 2010)
A female , anonymous writes:

I'm 26 and in love with a guy who's been through a lot of things with me. We're serious, and have even talked about getting married. The only problem I have is, that no matter how in love with him I seem to be, I can't stop a very strong attraction I have to his childhood best friend. I know we could never and would never pursue a relationship together, but I can't seem to do anything about this attraction I've felt to him since I first met him 3 1/2 years ago. The attraction is not just physical in nature. Somebody, anybody, please tell me what I can do.

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A female reader, Kels311 United Kingdom +, writes (1 September 2010):

If you feel that your not fully in love with your boy friend the best thing to do is to tell him that you might have feelings for your childhood best friend, if he loves you then he should understand. Other people may recommend talking to your friend about this but this is A BAD MOVE! If you go to your friend before your boyfriend then he might feel betrayed that you didn't speak to him about it and if your truly loved him then you would tell him the dilemma you where having.

To tell you the truth, i used to be like that. Except i wasn't getting married. I used to be in love with a guy that i used to be best friends with but i had a boyfriend who utterly adored me. Instead of talking to Calvin (my boyfriend) i went to Josh (my best friend) i said to him i think i have feelings for you and i don't know what to do. We had over a 7 year friendship and we haven't talked to each other in just over three years. The shock of it made him run a mile and thinking back on it now i knew i should have just gone straight to Calvin. I didn't sleep in the same bed as Calvin for 3 weeks because he felt that i had let him down. I did everything i could to make him love me again and it took 3 weeks for me to prove that he was the one.

I feel like i have just told you my life story but im being serious talk to your boyfriend first because bad things can come from leaving him till last. if you dont expect him to find out (which is just what i thought) then your wrong, the truth will always come out!

Good Luck

Follow your instict

Kels

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2006):

why is it that i understand what your going through..its the most confusing situation..it makes you ask urself a ton of questions..u kno that u love ur boyf...u also no dat his best mate relates to u in many ways..bu bottom line is...u have a caring man by ur side..uve been thru a lot togetha..u cud risk it for a 'moment' wid his best mate..but that moment cud cost u a lifetime of happiness...freind x

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A female reader, lellow +, writes (17 October 2006):

remember your in love with your boyfriend and all you feel is lust for his friend, if you really love your boyfriend then tell yourself that everyday and say to yourself that your boyfriends friend is just a friend and that he sees you in the same ways as this. x:X:x

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