A
female
age
22-25,
diane30561
writes:my BF and i have had some difficulties lately and last night he broke my heart. he has told me he loves me more than he can express... i know he does and i love him very much as well but he did something so stupid that i think i have to end it all... he left for Puerto rico for 10 day and was coming home last night.. i got ahold of him when he arived then asked him who was taking him home form the airport... he said he had to talk to me when he arrived at his house and didnt want to tell me who it was... i demanded and he said it was his ex girlfriend and that she had been taking care of the dog as well....my heart literally felt like it was coming out of my mouth he later said he was sorry that he was wrong... i told him i was sorry for him cuz i know how to keep a man but he has no idea how to keep himself out of trouble... the point is that its not about him doing nething with her its that if i would have called my ex to rescue me then that would have been the end of him n i... i wrote him one last text and he called again... i ignored it... i havent heard from him since... i did ask him to bring some stuff that was in his house and to drop it off in front of my garage.. when i got back home this afternoon it was all there... so please i need a guys response... does he feel so guilty that he doesnt want to lose pride in trying to talk this out or what??? am i wrong ...NEED HELP!!!!
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ex girlfriend, his ex, my ex, text Reply to this Question |
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female
reader, diane30561 +, writes (10 January 2008):
diane30561 is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni dont feel like its extreme... i know that if i decided to walk away from him because of it, i would have all reason to.... had i been the one to call my ex to watch my dog and pick me up from the airport he would have never spoken to me again.... and yes i agree with the other comment.... that if thats what he wanted then nothing was gonna stop him...
i have forgiven him for this but if he hurts me again in anyway i will walk away knowing i tried my best... you cant lose what you never had...
thanks again...
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 January 2008): Why, if you love a man, do you feel the need to end a relationship just because his ex looked after his dog while he was on holiday?
Seems a bit extreme.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 January 2008): He's "extremely insecure and doubted your love" so that's why he has been in touch with his ex?? He's lying. He was in touch with his ex because he wanted to be in touch with his ex. That was just a lame excuse.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2008): I would be careful if i were you. he has hurt you badly and may do so again.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (9 January 2008):
 All's well that ends well! Glad to hear the good news from you . It is just some communications problem.Now that you have solved your problems , just enjoy and be happy with each other.
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A
female
reader, diane30561 +, writes (8 January 2008):
diane30561 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all for for your comments... I did call him the following day and told him we needed to talk.. he showed up at my house immediatly... to respond to a few questions ... my license was suspended so im unable to drive though i did tell him i could find a ride and get there to pick him up ... he said that he would figure it out.. that he didnt want to bother my mom and ask her... i couldnt watch the dog cuz i have 1 dog in the house already and i wouldnt be able to drive to his house to feed his... he has alot of friends im positive he could have found someone.
when we spoke he listened cried and held me so tight we sat in the car for 4 hours... he told me he was truly sorrry and he doesnt know why hes so stupid to have hurt me... hes called a couple of times today and i think hes ok now... he says hes extrmely insecure and that he doubted my love saying it seemed to good to be true...
he came out of a relationship in which he did everything... im old fashion when it comes to my men... i do all i can and baby them (actually only him, ive never felt like going above and beyond for anyone else)i dont know i guess ill have to wait and see... thank you and feel free to comment right back..
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A
female
reader, shandygirl + ♥, writes (8 January 2008):
 Do you have a car? Could you have taken him to the airport? Could you have taken care of his dog while he was away? If so, then YES... you have a valid reason to really peed off.
If he couldn't get you to do these things for him, and if he couldn't find any of his buddies that he felt he could TRUST to take good care of his Dog while he was away... then it is possible that he made a desparate move as far as asking his ex girlfriend to do these things for him.
Talk to him & Find out the details of this situation before you totaly give up on him.
Also, I would tell him ( from here on) to totally cut off the contact with his ex... if he wants you.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2008): Oh jeez. Diane I am really sorry about this. That was very very wrong. BUT listen, you must relax. That's the most important thing right now. I don't know what kind of problems you two were having that led up to this but there is really no excuse. I don't understand. Have you by any chance been overly jealous with him?
I know I am not a guy but I have had plenty of boyfriends. So I know that the reason he has not called probably doesn't have anything to do with guilt. I am sure he does feel guilty. And I am POSITIVE that if you play your cards right he will feel extremely guilty. But he probably hasn't called because, and sorry to be so blunt, but he is being a jerk to you. He doesn't have the drive to fight for you. I get the impression that you two have been fighting alot and perhaps you have been very jealous with him?? Its possible that he has been getting tired of it and just been drifting apart from you. But you can change this.
But the most important thing for you to do is NOT panic. RELAX, cause I promise you its not the end of the world, not even close. What you need to do is take time away from him, just accept that he hasn't called you. Let him go, let him be, and seriously work on yourself. Workout, hang out with your girls, meditate, think, take lots of hot baths, do lots of exercise and try to figure out what went wrong, without panicking. Because I think he is afraid that you are going to blow up at him and he maybe is fed up and doesn't want to deal with it. I KNOW what he did was wrong. But show him that you are fabulous. And the way to do that is NOT call him, move on, and be HAPPY. Just say fuck it, and when he calls be really happy, DON'T ask questions about what happened and act really busy.
I hope you follow my advice and figure out what went wrong here. And once you do then you can decide what you want to do. But you need to take control of your life and your emotions again. That's the most important thing right now.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318 +, writes (8 January 2008):
Call him and let him know , you want to talk to him.See how he would response. If he wants to come out and talk, it would be fine ,if not, you will have to give him more time and try again.
There is nothing to talk about on that issue. It has happened and nothing can change that. let it be past and be bygones. You can only say sorry for what happened and then moved on. Talk on those things which are positive and you both agree on or find some common grounds .
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