A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Ok, there's this girl. Smart, funny, beautiful, etc etc. And I'm crazy about her. I've asked her out once, but she said no because she was already dating someone, and I didnt know. A few weeks later, she split up with him, and I began to work up the courage to ask her a second time. And then things got difficult...She started going out with one of my mates. And they are havin a great time together. So if they do split up, and I ask her, things could go in all the wrong directions. She could say no, and that would hurt me. She could say yes, and that would hurt my friend, coz he might think she "dumped" him to go out with me. Or, she could get really offended coz it would seem like I waited then jumped in the moment she was available, and I would lose her friendship. And if I wait a bit, she could start dating someone else before I can ask her again. So, I'm stuck. I cant ask her now, I cant ask her in the near future, I dont know if there will be a chance in the future at all, and she might just say no anyway and that would really hurt.Any ideas would be greatly appreciated: thanks.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Aunty_Amber +, writes (23 July 2008):
 hmmm this is a hard one.
i think that you should talk to her and your friend about how you feel about her (seperately or together - whichever is best/easier for you). i know that that is easier said than done but i really thing you ought to do it - both to save your friendship and to give yourself a little peace.
otherwise im afraid you might just have to let her go...which would you prefer, to go out with her and lose your mate or keep quiet and keep them both.
sorry if i have not been of any help.
good luck
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