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I love her and refuse to break up but we are on shaky ground!

Tagged as: Breaking up, Faded love, Gay relationships, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (5 October 2011) 5 Answers - (Newest, 5 October 2011)
A female United States age 26-29, anonymous writes:

My girlfriend and I have been together for over 3 months. I'm madly in love with her. She's...well she's in love with me right now. She has times when she'll be interested in somebody else, but she always gets over it and stays with me. Well yesterday, we were talking about how she likes this guy we both know and she told me how sometimes she has days she doesn't want to be with me(20% of the week she said). She said she isn't as in love with me as she used to be(but she still is in love with me). I was really hurt and she felt really bad and broke up with me because she hated of hurting me. I fought her on it, and now we're still together, but we're still on shakey ground. I love her and refuse to break up but....what the heck do I do?

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A female reader, wickedlycute United States +, writes (5 October 2011):

wickedlycute agony auntlet her go its for the best you'll find someone else. you'll find someone who loves you the same amount as you do her. and be happy. you'll find another girlfriend.

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (5 October 2011):

So_Very_Confused agony auntLet her go. Stop dragging out the ending. You are 17 and this is not going to end well. She is not your one true love... she is not the be all to end all...

IF she is not 100% committed to you now, she will walk eventually... and that will hurt and you may not get your closure...

do you want to follow after her and grab for crumbs?

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A male reader, immortaltech United States +, writes (5 October 2011):

This girl is playing you. It's never healthy when one person (you) is more emotionally involved than the other. You have to decide whether you truly are willing to continue loving her, knowing that you might not get the same love in return. If you are happy with 80% then stay. But that's kind of ridiculous...

Take a break and see how you both do after a month apart. Maybe you just need time off.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2011):

Let her go. You can`t force her to want to be with you or to love you the way she did before. You guys are young and her interests are wandering. It happens a lot at that age.

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A female reader, chocoholicforever United States +, writes (5 October 2011):

you should let her go. Don't be with someone who only wants you 80% of the time, and wants someone else for the other 20% of the time. Who knows in the future your percentage could get lower. Basically she's unsure about being with you. She even broke up with you already because she herself realized that this was being unfair to you. You need to accept this. You can't change someone, you can't make someone want something that they don't want. so you can't force her to want you 100%. You have to accept that if you're going to stay in a relationship with her, she'll always be interested in other people at least some of the time. And it isn't good for you to stay in such a relationship.

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