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I like parties, and love guys! But my mom is worried about me. What can I do to comfort her?

Tagged as: Family, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (26 November 2007) 3 Answers - (Newest, 27 November 2007)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

i am a wild teenager. i like to party and i love guys. my mom is scared im gonna turn out like her and shes a 32 year old lady on parol who just got out of prison. but i have tried every drug in the book and i dont like either of them,so you would think thats enough to show her im not onna ruin my life, but i do love sex and im a social weed smoker. meaning i smoke it once in a while wit friends,but i could live without it. so how do i prove to her that i ust like to have fun once in a while, but i know ow to get down to business when the time comes dow to it? hat is she worried about?she wasnt worried before when we were living on the streets and her husband was melesting me and i was begging her for help but she was always to high to help me. so why worry now se still the sam e what changed?

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (27 November 2007):

1) Get off the weed (it ain't doing you any favours)

2) Quit hanging around players.

3) Calm the hell down and chill. Being too wild is only gonna burn you out.

4) Save this crap for when you are a legal adult (otherwise what else have you to look forward too?).

5) What you call fun, at your age, is very destructive. Just because she was a druggie once, doesn't mean she hasn't got her act together.

A dug addict CAN help themselves, it just takes something like realising their daughter might go down that same shitty path.

So cut out all that shit. Get down to studying and get yourself a decent life. Then you will prove you can comfort her and help HER.

Flynn 24

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A female reader, pgissyd United Kingdom +, writes (26 November 2007):

pgissyd agony auntHun you sound really angry! You have had a very tough time of it, Im really angry for you too! You should be angry, vent that anger girl!

However, if you continue to treat your body the way you have done, your not going to be a very nice person when your older, Why are you having casual sex at your age? If you had a steady boyfriend whom you truely loved and you both felt ready, then that would be your choice, but your not, your letting your body be used by others, your filling it with drugs, be it regular or rare your still using, You say your father or step father molested you? why then are you allowing other males to touch and take advantage of you, have sex with you and so on?

I really dont feel for your mother, my skin crawls calling her such, For her to have allowed all that to happen to you, for her to have been so irresponsible towards her child, no care no love!

But you say she is now worried you will turn out like her, well she is right, you are going down that path. Has she stopped using, is that foul man out of your lives? does she stay clean and sober now? If not then she has no room to judge you, but if she is really trying, then its because she does love you and feels guilty and is trying to help you. Can you hate her for trying to make up for the past? You can hate her for the past but not for the future.

Give your body some respect, stop the casual sex, stop the drugs. Concentrate on school work a bit more, get good grades and a good job and a good man. Then maybe you can be a far better mother than your mum has been to you.

And please, I beg you, go and see a couselor or therepist, you really need someone to talk to.

Im happy for you to mail me anytime you want to talk. Please keep in touch.

Issy xxx

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A female reader, love-him United Kingdom +, writes (26 November 2007):

love-him agony auntHey sugar the fact that youve tried them has probs scared her more though =/ You need her to be able to trust you, cut out the drugs and let her know your having safe sex :) I hope you are ok and i wish you luck :) Feel free to mail me about anything x

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