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I like him, his sister is my friend, his mom my soccer coach, out of bounds if I make the first move, he acts like he fancies me as well?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Friends, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (22 May 2009) 1 Answers - (Newest, 18 January 2010)
A female Canada age 30-35, *optop197 writes:

Okay this is gonna be long so brace yourself.

There is this guy that I have a crush on. Sometimes I think he likes me and sometimes I'm not so sure. He is the brother of one of my friends on my soccer team. He is also my soccer coach’s son. At the end of this year I will be 17 and he will be 18. I saw him a while back when my soccer team and his soccer team were having a soccer practise together and I got a ridiculously strong "I like you" vibe from him.

Like he would sit beside me when every other time before this he would stand a little bit away except for the one time when there wasn't enough room so he walked up on the stage where, out of the corner of my eye, I could see him looking at me.

With his past behaviour, he had always seemed uncomfortable and quiet around me, but this last time when we were sitting beside each other he seemed really comfortable and at ease, you know, laughing, talking and joking around with his mom and sister. Something he never used to do when I was around.

And before this, whenever I would say something, he would kinda ignore me or pretend that he hadn't heard me, but this time everything I said got a response of some sort, he would either answer me, comment on what I said or laugh or chuckle.

When we were leaving the practise, he half heartedly fought his sister for the front seat but then gave up without much of a fight. This was unusual because I had seen them fight over the front seat before, and he fought much harder. He almost always won. Could this have possibly been because I was going to be sitting in the back seat?

I also just got back from another soccer practise with him. I didn't get as many signs as before, but I think I felt the vibe. I am still not 100% sure (though I will probably never be) that he isn't just being friendly. I was thinking about sending him an e-mail or send him a Facebook message (although he isn't a friend on Facebook so would it be weird if I just sent him a message? I am worried that adding him as a friend might weird him out). There were actually more things that he did but if I put everything in it would have been ridiculous. So I just put the most important stuff. And yes, I realize that I am totally over analyzing this situation. It's just that I really really like this guy! And if you knew what he was like before you would know that he was like a totally different person these last few times. This was the first time he actually showed some interest. He is shy and so am I so that is a potential problem as well.

Sorry this was so long. Thanks. Let me know what you think!

And the one thing I am worried about is that if I "make a move" and totally embarrass myself because he isn't interested, then everytime I see him or his mom and sister after that will be torture. His mom is my soccer coach after all.

View related questions: crush, facebook, shy

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A reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2010):

i had a similar problem with one of my ex's. i was too shy to ask him out or anything like that.

what i did was told him during a conversation "id say yes if you asked me out you know"

i didnt say it seriously. just casually. Then i could leave it up to him to decide or not. I find that if a guy is under pressure about asking a girl out, knowing they would say yes takes a whole world of weight off their shoulders and their more confident to ask :)

angel x

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