A
female
age
13-15,
RealFunkyDudette
writes:HIyyas im ur average kinda gal im happy go lucky lifestyle come what may never unhappy. But just one prob whenever i talk to my friends i always say "ooo i would snog him" but when i comes to it i dont understand i mean when i first snogged my bf i didnt know what was going on! I fancy boys but when i go out with them i go all shy thenm dump them! What can i do to help stop this? Not go out with boys?
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female
reader, L.O.S.E.R.  +, writes (29 September 2007):
 Maybe it's just cause you haven't got too much experience with it all yet,you might be a bit affraid cause you're not on your known field.Lots of us felt that way at first but it's all in the practice;)I like SalemsWhispers advice about creating a list tho,think it might help.There must be a pattern in your past doings and when you figure it out you'll be at ease.Could be something they did you didn't like,or way they tried to do it.Whatever it is,since you're so young there's no reason to be worried a lot-if you're shy and focus on controling it in front of a guy you like you'll get nervous and even more un-relaxed than usuall.Why don't you try to go out with some boy in a friendly manner?No need to kiss or anything more on the 1st date if you don't feel ok with that.Maybe that way you would relax through time.I definitely advice you not to stop dating cause when you have a problem in life the best you can do for yourself is to solve it,not run away.Hope I've been helpfull at least a bit:]]
A
female
reader, velvetcaroline +, writes (29 September 2007):
 I used to have this problem. I dont know if you said what age you were, but youre probably not ready.
Sound weird, but like the person before me said you need to be in a certain mental state. You need to be sure of yourself before you can bring other people into the equation whether it be a random snog or a proper boyfriend.
Dont worry, just find friends who support you and have fun!! If you develop a personality you love then guys will love you.
-caroline
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A
female
reader, SalemsWhispers  +, writes (29 September 2007):
 I think there is something wrong with your subconscious mental state...It seems like you are suffering from some sort of past trauma that will not let you move on....If I were you I would make a list & write down all the things you like about boys you've dated....then make another list about all the times you ended being shy around your boyfriends & why you dumped them....you need to figure this out....Deep down inside your subconscious you do this to protect yourself from something...as if though you are afraid of commitment or rejection...you need to figure this out when you dump a guy or shy off around him this is your coping mechanism...this is the technique you use when you feel threatened or uncomfortable in some sort away you find it much easier to shine your boyfriend off & dump him instead of sticking with him, & communicating with him & telling him how you feel....you rather run way instead of face your insecurities I could be wrong, but that is what it seems like....tell me about the women in family this might help explain your troubles
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