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I like an older man... help?

Tagged as: Age differences, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (25 March 2011) 7 Answers - (Newest, 26 March 2011)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I'm 17 years old, gonna be 18 in a little under two weeks. I'm just gonna be blunt, I like this friend I have, and he's about 36-37 years old, and we met online, of course, we have a lot in common, he knows how to cheer me up, and he's an amazing friend despite the age gap. I'm afraid to tell him how I feel, although I'm sure he wouldn't get mad or anything. He's not a pedophile or a pervert, he's really cool. Do any of you have any suggestions at how I could hint out to him? Thanks.. and also, please don't read this question just so that you'll be able to judge me. I know what I feel, I know it isn't exactly moral in society, but can I help it? No, not really. I just want an answer, not a long, strung-out paragraph of how sick I am...

Sincerely,

Absent-minded Teenager...

View related questions: met online, older man

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A reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2011):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

He actually doesn't call me his best friend, and i dont think he would be doing that. I haven't met him, he does not live here. He is not a predator. I feel like im wasting my breath....maybe ill just give up....

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A male reader, uncle bob Canada +, writes (25 March 2011):

uncle bob agony auntCONGRADULATIONS... You've hooked a PREDATOR!!!

Of course he knows how to cheer you up, he's probably very skilled in the art of gaining a young girl's confidence. He's probably been doing it for quite some time. He knows exactly what you need to hear and when you need to hear it. I'll even bet he calls you his best friend! That's how these guy's operate.

Of course the two of you have a lot in common. After all, your 18, he's 37. WAKE UP! It's called manipulation. The only thing he's waiting for now is for you to tell him how wonderful you think he is. That will be his "green light".

It then won't be long before he suggests the two of you meet, that is if he hasn't done it already.

Your young and impressionable. "Ripe for the picking", as it where, and he knows it!

Please, play safe, and don't become a statistic!

The Internet is one of the most dangerous places to meet anyone, and it doesn't matter how old you are.

If you open up to a stranger, whether on the web or in person, you become vulnerable, and open to attack.

Even if you have reached the age of consent in your country, that doesn't mean you can't be a victim!

For your own safety and peace of mind, shut this guy down NOW!

I suggest you go to "YouTube" and view the "Date Line" series of videos on catching pedophiles.

I believe you'll get a far better idea of what I'm talking about.

Be smart, not sorry!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (25 March 2011):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

@RJ101: We're probably not going to indulge in sex at all. I might be silly to feel like this but I wouldn't go that far, I don't even know if it'll happen. I'm just contemplating, sort of.

@anonymous: The last thing I'd want to do is get him in trouble because of my feelings, he's a great friend, and I don't want to be the reason he ends up in jail.

@SaphiraGold16: I'm pretty straightforward with my feelings, I don't beat around the bush as much as I used to when I was younger and more nervous. But I'm glad that there's someone in my situation,well similar. I think people my age are really immature, because thats all Ive really dated are people my age.

@week1: I understand where you're coming from, and maybe this feeling will pass with time, but I assure you he's not reeling me in, and never was in the first place. He's a good friend, and we have tons in common despite the age difference. I know what you're saying though.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (25 March 2011):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

@anonymous: I don't want to get him into trouble, i think im past the age of consent, not that thats what I, or even he for that matter, is interested in. I might just wait till I am 18 just to be safe, i would feel horrible if i got him thrown in jail.

@SaphiraGold16: I'm pretty straightforward with my feelings, and I always have been. I don't beat around the bush like I did when I was younger. I see that you guys can really understand eachother, and the one im interested in, hes even told me that he wants someone who he can connect with intellectually, and I am a bit of nerd, won science competitions, etc. I know I can look up to him for advice, and still be a teenager.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (25 March 2011):

I don't know about the States, but you could definitely get him into trouble.

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A female reader, week1 United States +, writes (25 March 2011):

girl....do not pursue this emotional feeling with this older man. this is very unhealthy given his age. you are still a child. he is reeling you in.

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A female reader, SaphiraGold16 United Kingdom +, writes (25 March 2011):

SaphiraGold16 agony auntHi hun.

Firstly let me say I notice we are in different countries I'm from the UK you are from the US.

I'm 17 and my partner of a year and a half is 37, he's the most amazing person I've had a pleasure of knowing he really is.

I can't advise anything about this guy of yours maybe tell him like you said he won't get mad, don't dress the words up just tell him how you feel and what he thinks about it.

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