A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:In my job I have met a lot of people. I first met "tony", the manager of a different department, when I was cleaning. He struck me as odd and quirky but I was not attracted to him. I thought he was good looking, but nothing more. Then one day I just started thinking about a relationship with him. We had a sort of chemistry. But there is one very huge difference, and that is our age. He is at least 14 years older than me. What should I do? I cant keep my mind off of him now. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Jia  +, writes (14 July 2008):
 I'm in a similar situation, and while I can't really do anything about my predicament because of the nature of my situation, I see nothing really wrong with what you're going through. If the age disparity between you two is all you're worried about then you don't really have much to worry about. Granted if you do choose to pursue a relationship with this guy, you'll have your fair share of problems, but then again what relationship doesn't? This might blow over with time, but if he wants you and you want him, what's the harm in trying to ask him out on a date indirectly? Sometimes women have to take the initiative when it comes to relationships and given the age gap dilemma here he's probably gonna try and be chivalrous and do nothing about the white elephant in the room. Try asking him out for coffee sometime if you haven't already, try to get to know him more and more each day and eventually work up the courage to officially ask him out on a date by a set date if he doesn't ask you first. Best Wishes!
A
male
reader, Frank B Kermit +, writes (14 July 2008):
 As long as you are both of legal age, and that the relationship would be based on mutual affection and respect, and not to fill some emotionally dysfunctional void on either of your parts, why not just go out with him?
I just completed a lecture on the topic of older men dating younger women and the emotional needs involved for both. It will be ready for sale by Friday July 20th. Check it out then if you are still unsure.
-Frank B Kermit
www.lulu.com/franktalks
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