A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend borrowed my laptop, when I got it back I found he has been watching gay and Bi porn. He also left facebook chat open and there it was right in front of me.... a conversation with an old male friend which stated they had had oral sex in the past. I have asked him before if he is Bi and he said no. If I ask him again and he denies it I will be heartbroken due to trust issues. Any advice how to handle this would be great thanks.
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionit was last week he was looking at gay porn. did not copy conv as want to see if he will be honest with me
A
female
reader, kellyxxx +, writes (1 July 2009):
 Its his past and he's obviously embarrassed! Just leave the issue alone and build up more evidence against him! Did you print the convo out? X
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2009): I have a feeling your boyfriend wanted to be caught. If not consiously then subcousiously. I think the best option is to confront him with what you discovered. I know it might be one of the most difficult things ever, but you need to decide if you can handle this fact, and get past it in your relationship. Because if you can't then its not worth staying in the relationship.
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A
female
reader, mitta +, writes (1 July 2009):
Ask him straight out. If he denies it then tell him you saw the conversation. Ask him why he feels the need to deny it.
He might be embarassed about it. But tell him you need to know what his sexuality truly is because you need to know where you stand. You might find it difficult to be in a relationship with someone who has sexual fantasies you cant fulfil... but on the other hand it might have been some harmless experimenting, and though he might fanatasise about it, he is on the spectrum of Straight - Gay mostly straight.
HTH
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