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I kissed someone else while we broke up, now ex wants me back..don't know whether to tell him about kiss or not

Tagged as: The ex-factor<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (5 January 2009) 4 Answers - (Newest, 5 January 2009)
A female United Kingdom age 41-50, *ola80x writes:

My ex and I broke up in nearly two months ago. We stayed in contact and almost got back together a couple of times until we had a big row three weeks ago and decided it was best to end it and have no contact at all. It was him that wanted no contact.

Over the last two weeks he has been contacting me and we agreed to keep in touch and stay friends and put the past behind us as we had been together for over a year and both still had feelings for each other but we agreed we were not getting back together.

During this two weeks I had a drunken night out where I kissed a guy I really was not ready to do something like that because I still love my ex and looking back it was a really stupid thing to do.

Thing is, my ex is asking to meet up and try work things out. Says he really misses me and thinks about me all the time. I feel the same way but I am feeling extremely guilty for kissing someone else and want to know should I tell him this? I know it will really hurt him and it might cause a row but Im afraid he might find out from someone else as we have mutual friends.

Even though we broke up he contacted me nearly everyday but I kissed this other guy before I realised there was any chance of us getting back together and thought we were just going to be friends.

I would NEVER dream of it if I thought there was a chance and even if we dont get back together I wont be doing anything like that in a hurry as I really do love my ex.

Thing is my ex is kinda the type of person who would hold something like this against me and make me feel bad.

View related questions: broke up, drunk, get back together, got back together, kissing, my ex

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A female reader, Susan Walsh United States +, writes (5 January 2009):

I agree, you did absolutely nothing wrong, and you have nothing to feel guilty about. Having said that, it can do no good whatsoever to tell him. Just prepare yourself to talk about it in case he does find out, but if you were broken up and you kissed someone else, that's your business.

Good luck.

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A female reader, x-kay_kay-x New Zealand +, writes (5 January 2009):

x-kay_kay-x agony auntYou don't have to tell him but does it matter, if you're both coming out with some secrets one night then tell him, maybe he did as well, you were split up at the time so it isn't wrong, if ya wanna be truthful then tell him but don't make a big deal out of it otherwise he might think it's still carrying on or it went further.

xxx

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A female reader, Emilysanswers United Kingdom +, writes (5 January 2009):

What possible reason is there to tell him?

You were single and drunk and it was a snog in a club... you hardly went back to his and slept with all his mates as well!

Move on from this and work out what will make you happiest in the long run.

Good Luck!! xx

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A reader, anonymous, writes (5 January 2009):

No need to mention it. You were broke up at the time. If questions are asked, deny it if you wish. Simple. None of his business.

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