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I just don't love you anymore

Tagged as: Faded love<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (25 November 2010) 2 Answers - (Newest, 25 November 2010)
A male United States age 51-59, anonymous writes:

I have been married for 18 years. I love my wife more than life itself. We have always had a 'rocky' marriage from the outside however we always made it work and deeply loved each other. this past year everything was great, better than it ever has been, she has been more affectionate, I have calmed down in my old age (38) I really felt as if we were coming into our own. About 2 Months ago she dropped the bomb that she doesn't love me anymore and wants to move out. Over the past 2 motnhs we have talked constantly about how to solve our problems, I have come to the realization I am not the perfect husband, however she has found her issues as well. She is completely unwilling to work on the marriage, only begrudgingly went to consuling. She tells me that when I am nice, when I try it makes her feel akward. I am worried because she agrees the last year was our best year, she said 4 months ago she thought the world of me and had stars in her eyes when she thought about me (her words) now, nothing. She seems to be pulling away from our son and her friends. Hanging out with new friends. Now she is with her parents for the holiday and when she returns says she will be moving out. I'm worried that something may be wrong and she is detaching herelf from everything she knows including our son which 4 months ago would have been impossible. Is there some imbalance that could occur in a 38 year old woman that would cause this drastic of change or am I just hoping it can be solved?

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A male reader, Cerberus_Raphael Sweden +, writes (25 November 2010):

Cerberus_Raphael agony auntIt may be an imbalance, spiritual or material. I think the time spent with her parents will be a good thing. It will give her time to think and perhaps she will change her mind. Love cannot just disappear like that but, she may have gotten jaded. I am not sure and I can never be sure about this because I do not know either of you, nonetheless, I am throwing that suggestion out there for your consideration.

For now, play along with this break. Prepare for change and prepare to have her remove herself from your life but keep hoping for the best. Keep hoping, have faith in the love you used to have for each other.

I hope that helps.

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A male reader, raybork United Kingdom +, writes (25 November 2010):

raybork agony auntI can only go by several similar relationship problems experienced by people I have been in contact with.

Your wife just may have found someone new.Someone who has affected her so much that she is not only prepared to cut you out of her life, but also your son and friends.

You say that when you try to be nice it makes her feel awkward,this I would say are actually guilty feelings.

You need to to find out what is the core problem, I hope it's not too late you.

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