A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hello, I need some help and advice.I have to decide between two men and I just dont know what to do.One is my ex. We dated for almost a year, and I know that is a short time but we had chemistry and nobody like him ever made me feel like that. He was special to me, he respected me, took care of me, and he felt the same way about me as I did with him. But unfortunately, he lived in another city so we barely saw eachother. Throughout time, when it started to be less time together we argued over dumb stuff over time, and we broke up a couple of times but quickly got back. Until we broke it off because he liked someone else, and so did I. Now, just one month later we started talking again and realized he only really wants to be with me, and I do too but my family dislikes him, and my friends as well. The distance is still there, making it hard. The other guy is my best friend, we've known eachother for 3 years more or less and he has been there for me for everything. I see him almost everyday, and though I find myself attracted to him, sometimes I feel like there is something is missing. Other times its fun and I feel comfortable with him, I believe we have the potential of working out but at the same time I believe my ex deserves another chance. Just that its so hard to pick.So who do i choose?It is so hard for me. They both agree that I need to pick because I can't date both.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, prenezmoila +, writes (29 December 2008):
 You need more time. Let them know what's going on as well. How they react may help you decide.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 December 2008): In matter of love,logic doesn't work. Flavour of your write up clearly indicates that you are inclined more towards your ex. If you are thinking of a serious relationship, listen to your heart. At the end of the day, it is you who matter NOT your family and friends. If you really love each other, distance can be negotiated suitably. You can move any time when you are ready.
My advice is keep it open with your ex. One year is too short a time to assess the real bond,though. You should give some more time to this relationship rather than pursue your friend where you know you will have to work things out and you know something is missing already
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