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I hate my life... I feel worthless, lonely and pathetic... please help!

Tagged as: Big Questions, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (15 December 2009) 5 Answers - (Newest, 28 July 2010)
A male United States age 26-29, anonymous writes:

I hate my life. I feel worthless, lonely and pathetic. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm not very social, i don't have a social life. I feel all alone, with no one who really cares.I don't really have any true friends and i've never had a girlfriend. So life pretty much stinks..i just stay in my house all day every day and i cant stand it. I know you're gonna say "get out there, be more social" but my parents have robbed me from a social life. It kinda feels as if they've robbed me of my childhood, and teen years. They don't let me go any where do anything. If i were to ask them to go somewhere with freinds, they'd say no. And think of all the bad things that may happen. " You're gonna get into peer pressure and get into drugs, they"re gonna steal and you'll be blamed and etc. they are so negative. And because of them, i see myself beying as negative too.

I'm always looking for the worst, cuz my whole life has always been the worst. ANd i know you're gonna tell me get involved in school, but my parents work, who's gonna take me and bring me back. And even if i did, i have to watch my lil sister any way. So i m just alone all by myself. I don't get along with my parents or my lil sister. I try to avoid my parents as much as possible.. that's how much they bug me. Im just waiting to go off on my own as an adult.. to see how the world would be. To see if god will make a miracle.. and change my luck, and my life. Cause everything bad always seems to happen to me. I never get the good out of anything. And i just dont know what to do anymore. Can anyone help me? Give me some advice? I's sorry for the long article, but this is nothing yet. Please reply, i'll appreciate it.

View related questions: drugs, never had a girlfriend

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A reader, anonymous, writes (28 July 2010):

Eh, my life is completely the same. Thought the only difference is that I choose not to be social, cuz people here are awful. You won't get accepted if you don't smoke,drink or if you aren't extremly "sexy." I won't bother wasting my time with people like that. Life really sucks here and the only reason I keep on living is because I know I'm going to move one day, though I am moving in 2 weeks from now. But because of all these years I've spent alone I don't think It'd be that easy for me to find friends. I had a few online friends. I also don't trust people very easily. Had an awful life so far. Lost everything when I was about 9 years old. My friends, my old house, old class and stuff. Since then it's been getting worse and worse for me. Well, as you said, you are going to be 18 one day and move, I assume that life might become better then. I've never had a boyfriend, for some reason people have never liked me, even though I was always nice. Anyways, I hope things get better for you and you should talk to your parents about the problem if you didn't so far. Good luck!....

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A male reader, benjiforlife1995 United States +, writes (29 May 2010):

yea so i was just looking for help with the same question and i saw ur thing heres what i want to say...

Im not going to say that u feel worse or i feel worse but my life sounds just the same.Your parents say that u will get into drugs and if feel this bad u probly will so in a way u cant really blamme them.Man u need to get a friend theres a couple ways u can get a true friend.You can go to some kinda church u might feel like u belong somewhere.Make friends with ur family so u can have trust u cant just be a walking zombie to ur family.dude i felt lonely as hell im 14 and i tried to kill myself but when i got sent to rehab i actually missed my parents and iv said they were dead to me before i go.If u look at the positives u will get threw this all i know is ur parents are alive,u have a house,a computer,and you can read and write.Fucking go and talk to ur nieghbor im not alowed out but i go across the street with my 53 old nieghbor and hes cool.Dude ive lost my favorite family members and i thought of them just like u talk about ur family,just dont make the same mistake as i did and not love them cause you will regrreat it for the rest of your life.respond to this if u can

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A female reader, Azure Rain United States +, writes (15 December 2009):

Your situation reminds me of my life as a teenager. My mom worked 3 jobs and I was never allowed to do anything. It sucked really bad and I too had a count down until i turned 18. I was a very good student and i never got into trouble but my mom still never let me do anything. When I was 15 I got a after school job.(that was allowed) it may have been because it was 1 block away from the house. It also gave me a sense of freedom and a break from being cooped up in the house all of the time. Even though I had a job she still wouldn't let me go to the mall with my friends or by myself.(she would say I could get kidnapped or someone might try to hurt me) Today as a 24 year old I realized that she did these things because she loved me so much she couldn't bear the thought of me being hurt. I still don't think that keeping me prisoner was the best thing to do.

Have you tried inviting friends over to your house to hang out? If your parents don't let you go out may your friends can come to you. (hopefully you have at least one friend who is willing to sit in the house with you.) Then maybe your parents will see that this friend is a good kid and let you go to his house next time. Then after a couple of visits they'll let you go to other places with this friend.

You could also have a sit down with your parents and tell them that you are a responsible young adult and you would like to have a "normal teenage life"

You could ask if you can join a extra curricular activity at school if they can not provide transportation ask if you could ride with a friend's parent (give them the other parent's cell # and address "just in case you come up missing lol" that way they will find you quickly.)

Finally don't hope for the worst out of every situation in life. It kinda like a self-fulling prophecy. If you believe in the worst than the worst will happen. Whatever you do in life look for the brightside because there is always a brightside.

I hope my advice is helpful.

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A female reader, Sincerely Yours United States +, writes (15 December 2009):

Sincerely Yours agony auntGet on facebook, myspace or even this site. Network on the internet. It's not face-to-face human reaction but you'd be surprised how much better it can make you feel each day. You'd also be surprised how many teens feel exactly like you do now. Do you have an older sibling who was into drugs or something? Is that what's making your parents so paranoid? Did something tragic happen to an Aunt or Uncle as a result of drugs/drinking/etc.? If so, confront that with your parents. Tell them you understand their paranoia but if there's one thing they taught you, it's good sense and you need to prove yourself. If you don't get out there now and learn to turn down peer pressure, you're going to go to college and flip your lid from all the freedom and make some seriously bad dicisions.

Anyway, if this doesn't work, then here's what you do: You go home everday, sulk, cry, get over it. If you can't change it, then strengthen up and deal with it until you're old enough to get out on your own.

~Sy

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A female reader, mezzo_soprano_reader United States +, writes (15 December 2009):

mezzo_soprano_reader agony auntOkay, honey, you're still very young. I was in that situation up until recently (my mother is getting so old and she FINALLY has become guilty for lying about my father's existence, but anyways)... I mean, it is understandable that you can't be involved more in extra-curricular activities and all, but that shouldn't stop you from taking projects home and getting them to school the next day or so.

I did that for SCA for the past three years, and my class ends up either winning or getting high marks. My grade and other grades end up loving it, and I get this amazing feeling. You can also meet some people DURING school hours to discuss some things you can find in common. I know my school has a program where students can be paired up with others based on interests.

And if it's really that bad, talk to a counselor about it, and they might be able to convince your parents to let you do something. If they expect you to go to college, you should try to convince them that you need something to get INTO college. Academics alone aren't going to cut it.

And please don't hate your life. As long as you're living and you're fighting each day to live, your life is very wonderful and special, mmkay?

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