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I had sex with my best friend and guess what? I'm now I'm in love with her.... so am I a lesbian?

Tagged as: Dating, Friends, Gay relationships, Sex, Teenage, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (16 April 2009) 5 Answers - (Newest, 16 April 2009)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

hi, im 17years old and i have a problem... and recently found that i have begun to have odd feelings towards my best friend who is also a girl.

shes unbelievably pretty, smart, funny and i melt when she speaks to me, which is quite often as i see her daily.

we recently had sex and kiss and stuff when we are drunk, and ever since i cant stop thinking about her, cos she is always the one who kisses me first.

iv have just split up with my boyfriend and she also has a boyfriend, no one knows about our drunken fumbles but i get so angry when her boyfriend messes her around i dont understand how he has the nerve to cos if i had her i would never let her go...

i dont find any other girl attractive just her....

am i a lesbien??

please help me.

x

View related questions: best friend, drunk, has a boyfriend, lesbian, split up

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A female reader, FLAgirl1113 United States +, writes (16 April 2009):

I heard one thing on tv yesterday..."There is no such thing as a homosexual...just homosexual activity." I think that sums it up. I believe it too. Don't ruin your friendship. The situation may get worse befor it gets better. You're still straight...all young people experiment with their sexuality. I did all through college.

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A female reader, loving arms United Kingdom +, writes (16 April 2009):

it sounds as though you guys have had a kiss and 'stuff' on more than one occassion, tihs being the case, you are not straight. The problem is we live in a world full of labels, labels for colour, race, sexuality, age etc. Truth is we really don't need a label. At this time you happen to want/have a relationship with someone of the same sex. It maybe the 1st and only one, it maybe the 1st of many. It really is unimportant.

You may not fancy other girls, but did you fancy other guys while you were in a relationship with your man? When you first felt all excited about him, when it was new? I doubt it. We usually only have eyes for the new person in our lives.

Just be happy, although check if she would want a relationship for just you and her where there is no guy for either of you.

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A female reader, love'me  +, writes (16 April 2009):

make sure your not mistaken and haven't fallen in love with your friendship.

all the laughs and everything. your proberly just going through a hormonal time, after you and your bf split up, and your proberly not a lesbian.

the thing where you were drunk was just a bit of fun and obv didn't mean anything to her.

the reason why your angry is becasue your friends, and your looking out for her.

hope this helps x

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A female reader, Cec1229 United States +, writes (16 April 2009):

Well, my friend has kind of the same problem, however, he is a boy. He recently found out that he is in love with his best friend who happens to be a boy. He found out he loves everything about him and even wants to be with him some day. I think it's the sweetest thing in the world.

We also really discussed how he really feels, and he said he's gay and now he's attracted to other guys as well. I think that's what will probably happen to you. You realize you're attracted to your friend, and then you could be attracted to other females. It's really common. I think it's a possibility you could be a lesbian, or bisexual.

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A female reader, ilovebowsandcherries United Kingdom +, writes (16 April 2009):

ilovebowsandcherries agony aunthun you may just be going through a stage in life where you are confused as to whether you are straight lesbian or bisexual.

alot of people go through it.

maybe you find her so special because of how well you guys get on and fair enough you feel her boyfriend treats her like rubbish but maybe it's because you care for her alot and you just want the best for her.

you've said you recently split up from your boyfriend so of course you seek comfort in friends and perhaps because she was so cmoforting and understanding you felt a bit more could just be because your going through a break up an wish you could find a guy like your friend.

alot of people find that because you know your friend in and out and she knows you and she knows how you like to be treated and you know how she likes to be treated.

it could just be mixed emotions

i don't think you're a lesbian you may be confused and upset due to your boyfriends split.

Hope this helps.

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