A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey everyoneI got out of long term relation ship which lasted for two and an half year. After that I started to work out and lost 20pounds quitted smoking. as a medical student my internship is about to start but I feel desperately unsuccessful and unhappy and lonely. I haven't dated seriously since then. I am afraid I can't love anymore on can't be loved :( my phone my Facebook my twitter my hometown there is not a current friend I am talking. I have friends but nobody gives a care about me I guess everybody busy with their studies bf or gf or I don't know. I am respectful guy inside good I believe I don't know if I am cute or charming or ugly piece of world. I dont wanna date just because to relieve my loneliness it is not fair i think.
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male
reader, macloverdoc +, writes (24 August 2014):
 while I was reading I smiled,felt motivated,dedicated.
wise owl thanks for such a caring answer.I think wise owl has pretty busy life for himself. you almost sounded like a doctor :D
12-month old toddler :)) :D
by the way I forgot to mention my relationship ended in almost 2 years ago. ended brutally which is really long story. But I'll trust myself and try to be more positive.I bought new clothes and cool products today. I'll try to ignore and kick out whenever the loneliness knock the door.
being alive comes with up and down times.(ecg) :)))
take care&stay positive and be happy man! thanks
A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 August 2014): Appreciate your smallest accomplishments. Count your blessings. You're only in your early twenties? What have you really got to complain about? You've got your youth!!!
Not everybody gets into medical school. You've quit smoking, and dropped the amount of weight equal to that of a 12-month old toddler. One almost has to stop to determine if you're bragging, or complaining.
You didn't say how long ago you ended your relationship, but I suspect you're going through a little bit of post-breakup depression. What you feel now is pretty typical. Just about everyone who answers your post can relate to what you're feeling right now.
You start to feel unattractive, rejected, numb, and maybe it seems no one even notices you. You feel you wasted your feelings, and you were never really appreciated. Been there and done that. You'll have good days and bad days. That comes with the territory.
Stop feeling sorry for yourself.
Once you become a doctor, women will throw themselves at you; and everyone will want to be your friend. Just for free medical advice! You'll have the potential to earn a very good living. Enjoy the peace and quite while you've got it. At least you don't have people trying to take advantage of you; which is much worse. Once you become an intern, you will have no time for yourself at all. Long busy days and nights, and a lot of stress. Very little sleep.
You don't have time for a pity-party, and there will be lives placed in your hands. Snap out of it my friend.
Use this time for rest, do your self-healing, and pull it together. Your internship is about to start, and you will have very little time for nonsense. Not even a social life. It will be hospitals, patients, and medical decisions.
You'll meet your new colleagues, and they'll be like family to you. Hospital staff will make you part of their daily soap opera drama, and you'll wish you didn't know anyone.
You've done enough reading and study in medical school,and you know a lot more about human physiology, mental-health, and depression than any layman. You know exactly what you should be doing about it. So do it.
Turn to family when your friends have abandoned you. Visit your older relatives who get less company. Reconnect with those family-members who live a long-distance from you, and may not have seen you since you were younger. Share your accomplishments with them. Go visit those who didn't make it to your graduation, and celebrate all you've done thus far. If you worship, visit your place of worship; and go see your spiritual leaders for guidance and inspiration.
They will give you comfort.
Our kin are the people who fill-in the gaps when we have no one else to depend on. They love us. They remind us that we are loved.
Unless you have hurt a lot of people; and have been alienated from your family, or you just don't like them; I think it's best to try and rebuild bridges and reconnect. They will lift your spirits, and support you until you get out of your emotional slump. That is what family is for.
Don't be so dramatic with that "I am afraid I can't love anymore on can't be loved :( "
Come on! Seriously, my friend?!! You know that isn't true. It's too soon, and you've got to pull your act together before you're ready for any romance anyway. Be your own best friend for now, and tell yourself how lucky and attractive you think you are. A little conceit is fair right now. You've got a great mind, and you're going to save lives. If that isn't a blessing, I don't know what is!
Well, when your internship starts, you'll be begging for some solitude, peace, and quiet. Trust me on that!
Just go visit your family and plan a picnic or cookout together. Invite everyone over to celebrate. Maybe that will help you to feel better. Mama can cook your favorite meals, and warm your heart and soul. Give you a long needed hug. It gets better. It just takes time.
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