| A
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: hi i have depression and used to hurt myself bit i dont anymore. im on medication for my depression but it still doesnt seem to be getting much better, i think it has made my anxiety worse aswell. my mum knows about it but i cant bring myself to tell her about it further. im depressed because im in love with my teacher but i dont think that is all of it but i dont know what else is causing it. sometimes my depression gets really bad and i break down in tears and cant stop crying, that has happened quite a lot espically in school but i cant tell my mum about it. also sometimes i really want to hurt myself but i dont as i know its not the answer and will only makes things worse. i havnt told my mum about that i used to hurt myself. i feel like i need to tell someone about it and my depression and anxiety but i dont know who. i am tempted to tell the teacher who i like about it as i trust him and i feel like i can talk to im but im not sure if i should as it may make him uncomfortable and he may wonder why i am telling him and not my year tutor. should i tell him or if not then who?
View related questions:
depressed, my teacher Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, deedee79  +, writes (25 June 2008):
I just am curious as to why you feel you cant tell your mom? Do you think she wont understand? You should try her and see. Us moms are a little more understanding then are kids think, well at least I can speak for myself that I am. As for your teacher I think you should tell him how you feel. Maybe he react better then you think too.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 January 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwell i told him i kept thnking about backing out but i went through with it. i told him that i had depression and was taking medication for it and he understood and was really caring and concern. he told me that it was common and that it was part of me and i had to accept it. when i told him i used hurt myself he didnt think i was a freak he was really sympathic and he told me reasons why i might do it and stuff. he advised that i get a book on depression. i feel really better as i needed to tell someone about it and needed them to understand and not treat me like a insane person. he said that we can talk anytime and that he wants to talk to me again.
thanks to everyone your advice has helped a lot
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni'm going to tell him tomorrow. i hope it goes well i don't know how i'm going to tell him. thanks to everyone that helped. i will tell you how it goes
...............................
A
male
reader, Willy Coyote  +, writes (5 January 2008):
Don't worry. Above all else, you should not and you will not have your depression made worse because of your teacher. You should be able to talk to him and he will be understanding and keep what you say in confidence. Everything will be ok!
...............................
A
male
reader, Sweet111 +, writes (23 December 2007):
yeah, I'm not sure either, perhaps he would have to respect your confidentiality, I'm not sure but I'm sure if you spoke to him you'd find out...
maybe it would be worth keeping the fact that you used to hurt yourself to yourself for the 1st time... if you spoke about something else and only he knew, only to be questioned later on by your parents, you'd know that he'd told them either by choice or by the fact that he had to... i'm not sure where teachers stand on confidentiality...
thanks for your thanks tho!! netime :)
...............................
A
female
reader, starfairy +, writes (22 December 2007):
 I think if you USED to hurt yourself, he won't have to tell your parents, I think if you were to tell him something totally drastic like you had been raped or soemthing, he would probably have a moral and legal obligation to tell the authorities/your parents...
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionim wondering if i tell him that i used to hurt myself will he have to tell my parents or year tutors about it even though i dont do it any more. thanks for all the help espicailly sweet111 and starfairy.
...............................
A
female
reader, starfairy +, writes (19 December 2007):
Ask him before the lesson if you can talk to him in confidence after the lesson, so you can be sure he will have time.
Start off by telling him you have had something on your chest for some time now and have had a hard time telling anyone about it.
I'm sure being a teacher he has seen and heard much worse than your scenario...
Good luck xx
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 December 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionive decided that i will proably tell him about my depression and hurting myself after the xmas holidays, but does anyone have any advice on how to start the conversation off as i will do it after the lesson when there is just us
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 December 2007): 'Kids' or teenagers fall in love with their teachers because generally they are the only people that are always there for them. Like when your bullied they're there to talk. That's just an example - not something that has happened to me.
Also they're everything girls like. Intelligent, wise, mature, kind, respectful etc etc etc and when they have things in common, age difference never matters. They don't tend to even want their money.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2007): you would be supprised, i totally like my teacher who is alot older than me and we have quite alot in common, why? co he is immature and acts my ages anyways, seriously.
He likes the same music as me and has the same views on most things so ... its jsut like liking another boy in my year basically ;) except this one is hotter and way fit =]
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2007): Why are you in love with your teacher? How old is he? What makes you think you are in love with him? As a much older man (I'm in my 40s), I don't understand why there are so many posts here from young teenage girls who have a thing for their teachers. What is up with that?
I have been reading a lot of posts from girls like you who have a thing for their teacher, especially older ones, like male teachers in their 40s. If anyone here, especially you girls or women, can explain why a teenage girl would fall in love with a male teacher, especially one who is old enough to be her father, please do so. I cannot understand why a young girl would fall in love with a man who is so much older. It seems like they would not have much in common.
...............................
A
male
reader, Sweet111 +, writes (16 December 2007):
It's not going to be easy which ever way you tell them, you just have to be confident and although it wont be easy, it's very important if you can get someoneto share your problems with. Trust me, you're not alone, and if you want to talk to some of us then I'm sure we'd all try to help!
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 December 2007): You could do that, but you do need to sort it out. It'll only go on forever. You need to do it before the summer break, where it'll be months without him. That's painful I gota tell you.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 December 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni think i may tell my teacher about that i used to hurt myself and that my anxiety and depression is still bad. but if i do i will wait until after the christmas holidays as i can think it through properly. thanks to all for the advice. but im still unsure on how to tell him or my mum.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 December 2007): I am going almost exactly what your going through and it's such a relief someone feels the same way I do. If you have someone you can turn to that's great. Personally, I am not all that close to my family which doesn't help whatsoever, but if you can talk to them you need to. This is obviously very hard, almost impossible for me personally to do.In my school we have a sort of mentoring scheme, in which I talk to my teacher about all the problems I have. Unfortunatley, my mentor is the one I like a huge amount which makes it pretty impossible to tell them my actual problem. If you tell them your not very happy, or you want something done about it you should tell your mum, and you don't need to necessarily tell the problem. Your mum would respect that you don't want to tell her, and would want to help if there was something wrong. She loves you a lot and would do anything for you.You can't go on like this, something I learnt the hard way, and you need to get it sorted out as soon as possible before the situation turns even worse. It can get worse.If all else fails, if you have the courage to talk to your teacher do that. Even though something is unlikely to happen - be prepared for rejection - he should at least talk it through with you.Sorry it's long, and take care.Good luck.
...............................
A
male
reader, Sweet111 +, writes (16 December 2007):
Hi,
As a person who has symptoms of depression I can safely say you really need to talk to your mother... your family really are important for you... well they are to me... without them who knows what I'd be doing...
When I feel the world gets too much for me, i turn to them, and they're the ones who got me to see that there are ways to deal with it.
As yourself, I've been on medication, and like you, I didn't feel they did much, but stick it out, and you can battle it.
As for your teacher, if it makes it easier, then talk to him, explain how you feel, you especially need to do this if your work is suffering because of the way you feel.
I wish you the best of luck...
If you need someone to talk to anytime then message me...
Its what we're here for...
Anytime x
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 December 2007): I think you should tell him if you think it will help then talk to him. You need to talk to sum1 who your comfortuble around and that is him! He should understand that u wanna talk to him and not your form tutur because its better telling sum1 you dont c as much !!GOOD LUCK n i hope you start feelin better xtel us wot happens xx
...............................
A
female
reader, starfairy +, writes (16 December 2007):
You need to talk to your Mom or someone close. You need help, you need counselling. Thought of hurting yourself are not healthy and seems to me a big cry for help.
Counselling is a great opportunity to vent the pent up feelings you find hard to express.
Message me if you need to talk, very often that really helps, I'm always here :o) x
...............................
A
female
reader, R.Wren +, writes (16 December 2007):
 hey sorry to hear about all that, yeh i agree wid you that is not the answer and will make things worse, im only sayin becareful wid your teacher, u cud do somink you'l regret in life. i kno im a stranger in all and none of my buiseness but ive been in the same shoes u have been kinda, if you need to talk to anyone, message me ok . goodluck m'girl.
R.Wren.
...............................
|
