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I feel like my love for him died.

Tagged as: Age differences, Dating, Family, Pregnancy, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (2 September 2012) 8 Answers - (Newest, 4 September 2012)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I had a pregnancy scare a few days ago, I told my bf and I took a test, it came out positive. But, just to be sure I made an appointment for another test. At first, my bf seemed supportive and soothed my nerves. On our way to the appointment though, he changed and really hurt me by asking if I had been having sex with someone else. He also told me I was playing him for someone stupid and he blamed me for getting pregnant on purpose. Anyway, test came out negative. He was back to "normal" after that. I feel like my love for him died. We've been together almost three yrs and I can't believe he acted like that with me... I'm planning on breaking it off but a friend of mine says I'm being silly and that his reaction was perfectly normal. Really? Is that how men act in these situations? I felt like he stabbed me and he even told his sister about it without asking me how I felt about it. Now, I feel like he would have put me in the "trifling-wh*re" out to trap him if I had been pregnant. He's 15yrs older than me too if that makes a difference. Am I overreacting?

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A female reader, deirdre Ireland +, writes (4 September 2012):

I think you are not overreacting AT ALL!

What a horrible way to treat you when you were obviously stressed out and upset aswell as a load of other emotions.

Also you say the first test was positive... you dont normally get false positives with pregnancy tests so if I were you I would do another test in 2 weeks time to be sure, not trying to worry you but it did cross my mind while reading your question. good luck in every way!

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (2 September 2012):

Honeypie agony auntWow, I would have kicked him out of the car while it was still moving if that was me!

No, his reaction isn't NORMAL. The first thing out of his mouth when you sit there WORRIED about a potential pregnancy is that you MUST have cheated?

Sorry, I would end it.

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A female reader, Lucky786 United Kingdom +, writes (2 September 2012):

Lucky786 agony auntI think his reaction is a major red flag for your relationship and I don't think you are overreacting at all.

His reaction shows that he doesn' trust you. It shows you cannot rely upon him when the relationship faces challenges. I'd seriously question your future together.

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A female reader, chigirl Norway +, writes (2 September 2012):

chigirl agony auntHis reaction was normal, sure.. It showed who he truly is. He's someone who doesn't trust you, accuses you of things, and doesn't back you up when things get tough. Nice guy, huh?

I'm backing you up on this on, he was out of line, and if you want to break up with him I completely understand. This is who he is. This is how he reacts to things in life that catch him off guard. There will be many more things that will happen in life, and he will react in this manner again. You just got a glimpse of the true him. Wise decision to back away. This is not how all men act.

He sounds very immature, and not like a good person. For his age he should know better, him not knowing better just shows a lack of maturity on his part, and shows that he's probably not going to mature any time soon either.

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A female reader, Aemita Romania +, writes (2 September 2012):

Aemita agony auntNo honey, you are NOT overreacting! He was the one to pull a stupid move on you.

I'd say (and i REALLY strongly, whole-heartedly recommend it)... break up with him!

You will do yourself a huge favour in the long run!

Just break up and move on! You deserve so much more from a man. More than he can offer you!

Hugs and kisses! ^_~

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A male reader, Hennessy1989 United Kingdom +, writes (2 September 2012):

Hennessy1989 agony auntFrom a guys point of view I don't think you are over reacting, he was obviously panicking and took it all out on you, he was wrong, and after 3 years he should have a bit more respect for you, and him being that much older he should be a bit more mature, the choice is yours, it could have just been that he was worried about the situation, good luck

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A female reader, kellyO United Kingdom +, writes (2 September 2012):

kellyO agony auntDear Anom,

You are right.

Hugs

Kelly

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A male reader, Xearo Trinidad and Tobago +, writes (2 September 2012):

I don't think you are over reacting. It does raise an interesting point on what he would do to you if you were really pregnant, and I don't think it would have been anything good. For someone 15yrs older one would not have expected a 180degrees flip on feelings especially with a 3yr relationship.

Sure some men do react bad but like I said, you raised an interesting thought on how he would really have been.

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