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I feel like a failed mother as my son masturbates all the time.

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Question - (5 October 2008) 11 Answers - (Newest, 8 October 2008)
A age 22-25, anonymous writes:

I am I concerned mother, my son is 14 years old, and he masturbates, but the thing is that, he masturbates anywhere he wants, last night we were having dinner, whith my husband, my other son and my two daughters, and he just started masturbating while dinner, he has done this about three time, and my husband just says that boys will be boys, he was pulled out of class many times for getting caught doing it, he once even made his little brother masturbate him, I feel that I am failing as a mother, and I am scared my marriage will collapse, please help!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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A female reader, tayalouise United Kingdom +, writes (8 October 2008):

tayalouise agony auntThis doesn't sound normal, maybe you should tell him that its perfectly natural to do it, but not everyone wants to see it and he can do it in his room only and nowhere else.

If he can't cope with that maybe theres some kind of medical problem.

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A female reader, leanne _a  United Kingdom +, writes (5 October 2008):

leanne _a  agony aunthmmm if that is a joke some one has got a sick sick mind that is wrong you shouldnt be saying things like these not now a days when stuff like child abuse and thigs go on like this you should be ashamed you scruffy bastard

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A female reader, BigSis United Kingdom +, writes (5 October 2008):

BigSis agony auntHA! Sussed!!

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A female reader, anon642 United Kingdom +, writes (5 October 2008):

anon642 agony auntHmm.

This ones interesting.

Simply because the comments are very true indeed.

Either someone is playing some sick joke, or there any many users in the house using this site and they are not logging out.

Either way, im quite concerned both at the situation and the given details.

Hope this situation gets resolved!

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A male reader, Passthrough United States +, writes (5 October 2008):

Passthrough agony auntAt age 18-25, dont you think you are a bit young to have 4 children, and one who is 14?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2008):

Yeah, hlskitten, I wondered about that too. Do you think that there might be 2 people in the house on the same computer and one answered without knowing that the other was the one who wrote the question?

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A female reader, ElektraHi Cuba +, writes (5 October 2008):

ElektraHi agony auntHi there am 14 and i have a boyfriend thats 16.So i have a better look on things.if your boy at 14 is doing those things theres something wrong with him.he either want attention or he is really sexually active.theres no reason for him to tell his little brother to do thats wrong boiy should have morals in class is really dumb maybe its gets his peers to notice him.and infront of you same thing boy needs attention it is normal for a boy to masturbate . but not like that in the bathroom in his room with the door locked.and like 2 days a week. you should have a serious talk to him with you and your husband.he needs it. my boyfriend as an example he dosent masturbate because he is not sexually active.and asked him about that and he said that boys who masturbate at that age are just curious and unsure of sex..so yea you should have a serious talk to him about that..its serious you dont know what he is thinking and if one day he is going to want to take it to the next level.

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A female reader, hlskitten United Kingdom +, writes (5 October 2008):

hlskitten agony auntA reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2008):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Wow you need to gett this boy to calm down, sit with him and tell him that it is a private practice

Why have you posted an answer to your own question?

How screwie! Doesn't happen often this, but it makes me chuckle when it does!

C xxxx

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A female reader, AskEve United Kingdom + , writes (5 October 2008):

AskEve agony auntIt is normal for boys to masturbate around this age but there should be boundaries. I suggest you have a serious talk with your husband about this and let him know it's affecting his schooling. Let him know too that he's involved his little brother in this and it's NOT acceptable! You and your husband need to be on the same page about this and he should pull your son up for it too if he sees him doing it openly.

I would also suggest you have a little talk with your son and let him know that masturbating (or touching himself intimately if you don't want to use that word to him) is a very private thing and if he wants to do it then it should be done in private and definitely not at the dinner table or at school. If no one lets him know that it is wrong to do this openly then he'll think it's acceptable and just continue.

~Eve~

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A reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2008):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Wow you need to gett this boy to calm down, sit with him and tell him that it is a private practice

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A female reader, chandra Mcmillan United Kingdom +, writes (5 October 2008):

chandra Mcmillan agony auntThe way your son is acting is strange to me. A lot of boys now a days are open in sayin things to their mates and even their parents about masterbating and their other sexual experiences. but getting his little brother to do it too him is incest and very very wrong. I think it would be a benefit to you to speak to your family doctor and ask them if there could be any other reasons for his behaviour. There are some illness's that can cause this kind of attitude and behaviour. Obviously I am not saying your son is mentally ill but there are some charecterisits of ADHD (Attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder). SPEAK TO YOUR DOCTOR PLEASE.

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