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I feel guilty about masturbating

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Question - (22 January 2011) 13 Answers - (Newest, 24 January 2011)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, *nord writes:

I'm a 17 year old bisexual female. I started masturbating to porn about a year and a half ago and feel so much guilt about it. I'm very ashamed myself, I don't think any of my friends do this. Am I a monster?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (24 January 2011):

Honey don't worry I've know people, both guys & girls, that started sooner then that. Masturbation is a part of stress release and is a way to let you know for you to know what you like so you can tell your future partner what you like.

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A female reader, SallyR87 Australia +, writes (23 January 2011):

SallyR87 agony auntYou're fine! Relax and enjoy yourself. Masterbation is the best and safest way to become sexually aware of what you like both physically and mentally.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (22 January 2011):

it is perfectly natural to do this and im sure all your friends do it , but girlz for some reason dont talk about it like men do coz weomen find it more embararsin personnaly its natural and dont find it tht embarrasin so dont feel guilty coz everyone does it they just keep it to themselves :) RED LIPZ XX

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A male reader, Kilcardy United States +, writes (22 January 2011):

If God didn't want us to masturbate, he'd have made our arms a lot shorter : Sex is supposed to be fun. Enjoy it. Just be safe.

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A male reader, duron South Africa +, writes (22 January 2011):

duron agony auntAm male and I also masterbate, but sometimes I feel like you do because people discourage me from doing it, especially religious wise, they judge people who do it. But I think it's alright if you do it and it makes you feel good because at the end of the day you're the only person who knows how to make yourself happy, and you are not a monster, you are human.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (22 January 2011):

youre perfectly normal,dont worry.I'm a girl and I masterbate a lot,I've done it since I was a young teenager

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A reader, anonymous, writes (22 January 2011):

As the others as said, it is nothing to be ashamed of, what you are doing it perfectly natural, and although women tend to admit it less than men lots of women masturbate.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (22 January 2011):

No worries. When I was your age I used to mastrubate 10 or 12 times a day, and bring myself to climax 5 or 6 times a day. Your not a monster, and this way you can relieve your "urges" without a partner, and have less worries about STD's and pregnancy, and you won't be the town doorknob.

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A female reader, LizBeth United States +, writes (22 January 2011):

You are NOT a monster. You are not doing anything to be ashamed of. Masturbation is normal, as is masturbating to pornography. I don't know who put this notion in your head, or where you learned that masturbation is so awful, but it's not. Please do what you can to understand that you're normal.

The only thing I would say is to make sure you don't have a porn addiction. Do you feel like you can't do without porn? Do you get upset if you can't find time to watch it? Does watching prevent you from doing every day activities? I'm NOT NOT NOT saying you have an addiction, I just want YOU to be sure it's not an issue. Watching it isn't bad, but becoming addicted (to anything) can be.

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A male reader, dirtball United States +, writes (22 January 2011):

dirtball agony auntYou've got nothing to be ashamed of. No worries. It's not something a lot of people talk about, but I'd be willing to bet that more of your friends do it than you think.

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A female reader, DanceInTheDark Canada +, writes (22 January 2011):

DanceInTheDark agony auntIt's perfectly natural.

And chances are your friends do, or will do it at some point in their life

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A reader, anonymous, writes (22 January 2011):

Im a 16 year old girl and i do it every other day theres nothing wrong with it its how you find out what you like and dislike. Plus your friends probly wouldnt tell you if they did sence its kinda private. The only person who knows i do it is my boyfriend and he does it to. Also porn is made for people to get turned on and masturbate to and a whole lot of people watch that so your not alone.

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A female reader, petina1 United Kingdom +, writes (22 January 2011):

petina1 agony auntNo you are not a monster. How do you know your friends don't do it. i'm sure they do. Stop worrying about it and don't be ashamed, enjoy your sexuality.

Is there anything in your life at the moment that you would like to change or worried about,'career, friends'job? If you found another outlet that would help you engage in something else. Sometimes when things come in excess it's because we have anxieties, you need to have a think about what they can be and then how to make things better for yourself, by giving your self a plan to follow. But, like i said, it's nothing to be ashamed of, but if you are feeling ashamed then that's coming from within yourself and you must tackle the plan of your life.

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