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I feel embarassed to show him to my friends as he is 'not as fit' as all my old boyfriends.

Tagged as: Friends, Sex, Teenage, The ex-factor, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (1 June 2007) 5 Answers - (Newest, 15 June 2007)
A age 30-35, * writes:

I am lost with what to do with my (currently ex) boyfriend. I knew him for about a year back when we were both about 14, and liked each other but we were immature/naive and didnt do anything. He moved and i thought i had lost him forever. Suddenly, about 2 months ago he rang me and had managed to get my number. i LOVE him to bits, and just the thought of not being with him tears us both apart but I feel embarassed to show him to my friends as he is 'not as fit' as all my old boyfriends. i feel SO ashamed to be like this and don't know what to do!

Additionally, i broke up with him recently because i knew he wanted to have sex with me. I am not that old yet have had plenty of experience,but with him i feel that (maybe because of his size) i am DESPERATE to do it with him,but feel that as soon as i do i won't want to be with him anymore?? and i cant bear the thought of losing him again...but then sometimes just want to leave him and find someone else who i truely care about in EVERY aspect? What should i do??

View related questions: broke up, immature

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A female reader, Skeez United Kingdom +, writes (15 June 2007):

Skeez agony auntI agree with Askeve. You obviously dont love him, otherwise you would have no problem showing him off to your friends and the whole world. And I dont understand what you mean by his size? Are you on about his penis size? and if you are, If you really loved him, his size wouldnt matter to you. Love is mor important than sex. My boyfriend isnt particually big down there, but I still love him. Im sorry to feel as though you are being rather immature, but saying that you feel ashamed about all of this is good, as majority of people dont care. If you have so many doubts about the relationship and ever getting closer to your guy, I think you two should part. Let him find someone who wont keep in closed in and a secret from the world.

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A female reader, AskEve United Kingdom +, writes (2 June 2007):

AskEve agony auntHe's not for you if you find his size a problem. Move on and spare him getting involved with you again as you'll only end up hurting him. Everyone has faults (even you)it's just a shame that you like him but obviously not enough to let everyone know you're with him. Cut him free, he deserves someone who can love him inside AND out!

Eve

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2007):

i have tried to look past it, but now i realise i was just loking for excuses because he is constantly lieing to me, and no matter what i always seem to find out. Thank you for all your help, i was prepared to look past my STUPID immaturness, but maybe next time i will grow up sooner!! Ah well, we shall see :) thanks again xxx

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A male reader, Jamer70 United Kingdom +, writes (1 June 2007):

Jamer70 agony auntIf you love him too bits then you should want to parade him around town, no matter of his looks.

Its good you feel bad about this as in most all cases if one partner is ashamed of how the other look than they should not be together.

Because in my opnion if you truely love someone you can easily look past their psyical appearance.

My advice would be either grow up and look past it or dont be with him as he deserves to be with someone who loves all of him.

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A female reader, flower girl United Kingdom +, writes (1 June 2007):

flower girl agony auntBabe i am not trying to put you down, but i think at your age it is very difficult to understand the true meaning of love. The fact that you are embarrased to show him off to your friends suggests to me that you are not actually in love with him because if you were you would be very proud to show him off to everyone...

However i am glad to see that you have your head screwed on when it comes to sleeping with him, if he truly likes you he will be prepared to wait and if he is not then i would say move on and find someone that is prepared to wait.

Take care .xx

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