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I feel cheated...

Tagged as: Marriage problems, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (9 September 2009) 2 Answers - (Newest, 10 September 2009)
A female age , anonymous writes:

I have been married for 28 years to my spanish husband. His parents lives in Oklahoma. He goes out there and leaves me at home at least 2 times a year. I know they are getting on up in age but, we need a vacation together sometimes. Is it wrong for me to feel hurt and angry at him for this? When he is with them he doesn't call me much at all. I feel he is selfish and that his mother puts pressure on him to come out there to often. He is never really at home with me much. He travels with the company he works for and I see him maybe 12 days out of the month.

We also own a side business so that takes a lot of his time when he is at home. That's why I ask for some feed back on this. I feel cheated when the whole 28 years of our marriage, all the vacation times goes to his family..

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2009):

I dont think EVERY vacation should be HIM at HIS parents he is MARRIED to you not THEM when is it your turn maybe he should read the bible the lord says to put the WIFE first sounds to me like he puts you LAST and you've put up with this for 28 yrs you must be a very strong woman dont know anyone that would do it good luck and god bless

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A female reader, Minelisse Puerto Rico +, writes (10 September 2009):

Minelisse agony auntWell, maybe you are accustomed to this situation but the truth is that him going to see his parents doesn't have to equal time apart. You could go with him; you could meet him there and then go to a road trip together; he could call more often; he could change jobs. My point is that this is something you are partly responsible for, he has done it, you have let him do it. Just try to sit down and have a talk with him to see if you can manage a routine change or if there is a deeper problem to solve there.

Regarding your question, you wanting to spend more than 12 days a month with him doesn't seem extreme. That is what most married couples want/ask for/need. Good luck!

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