A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I had been speaking to this guy that I met online.. we had been flirting away and getting on super well. Time passed as he asked to meet which I agreed. However he didn't make it and I found out it was because he has a girlfriend.I've accepted it and we said we would be friends. However he kept sending me flirty texts and I asked why, he kept saying "it's just flirting, nothing else"I am so mad that he is happy while his girlfriend is not aware of this. And I am left feeling used.My friends keep saying I shoul tell his girlfriend about the messages he sent me. But is that the right thing to do?I would want to know if my man was potentially cheating on me but I dunno? What do you think?
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flirt, has a girlfriend, met online, text Reply to this Question
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (22 May 2017):
 No it is not your place to tell his girlfriend. The moment that you found out he had a girlfriend you should have blocked him and never looked back. Instead you agreed to be friends, probably because you liked the attention he gave you. Stop allowing this contact to happen, block his number and move on with your life.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 May 2017): It depends on where you're coming from. If you want to tell her because you're upset and want to hurt him or his happiness, then don't do it. If you're genuinely concerned about the other girl and think she has a right to know, then do it. Personally if I were the other girl, I'd want to know. But the reason I say be careful with your motivation/intent is that she might be able to tell wher you're coming from. If you're sincere and kind of just mean and biter. And it's hard to believe someone who's the latter.It's also not healthy for you to keep holding on when you need just to move on.
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A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (21 May 2017):
 You shouldn't have agreed to be friends with him once you knew he had a girlfriend. If you had cut him off then and there, he wouldn't have had the audacity to mess with you any further.
Tell his girlfriend the truth if you like although I don't think it'll change much. He'll probably sweet-talk her into believing him and she will. It's also unlikely that she absolutely has no idea that her boyfriend is an ass. A woman's intuition is very strong and very rarely do they not guess that something's not right in the relationship. She probably knows and is still keeping quiet. Tell her though. Send her screenshots of his messages. Let him be in some trouble at least.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 May 2017): I'd tell his gf, she has the right to know that her bf is a scumbag. He even wanted to meet you so it was not just harmless flirting.
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious + ♥, writes (21 May 2017):
 SHE is not your problem. She will find out in time what her boyfriend is like. Don't be responsible for her pain.
When you look back on his episode in years to come, will you be PROUD of how you handled it? If you draw a line under this NOW and tell him to sling his hook, you can look back and be proud of yourself.
You know it makes sense.
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A
female
reader, Ivyblue  +, writes (21 May 2017):
 No I dont think so. But next time he contacts you should tell him that you will if he continues to do so. Move on love, who wants a sneaky friend like that anyway?
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (21 May 2017):
 You could tell her. My question to you is this, WHEN you know the MOMENT he told you he had a GF that nothing would come of it (as far as romance) why didn't you just cut him off or block him? When he continued to "flirt", you could have AT ANY POINT have cut him off.
What you end up doing by telling the GF is "punishing" HER rather than him. Don't you think?
I know you want him to be punished more than you want HER to know the truth about her BF and THAT I find is not a good mindset.
Personally? I don't think I would tell her. I'd TAKE it as a lesson in life...
If you don't want people to USE you in the future - don't LET them use you. When you find out they have a GF or are twats, you CUT THEM OFF - BLOCK them and move on.
IF you have "evidence" and still wants to tell her and is WILLING to look like an ass yourself, then tell her. And I say "ass" because... YOU continued to talk and "flirt" AFTER you knew he had a GF, so does that really make YOU any better than him? You have ABSOLUTELY no moral high ground here. IMHO
My guess is... SHE already knows he is a flirt and she is still with him.
Brush it off and know better NEXT time.
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