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I envy the males!

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Question - (31 March 2009) 8 Answers - (Newest, 2 April 2009)
A female Canada age 41-50, anonymous writes:

I envy the males, they can be good looking and charming without trying. Girls have to make themselves into sluts at all ages to get a boyfriend that's not fair. Opinions please.

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A male reader, core_confusion United Kingdom +, writes (2 April 2009):

core_confusion agony auntOK, my opinion for what it's worth.

Speaking entirely as a male here, I personally have no interest in women that seek to 'cover themselves up' with layers of makeup. It usually looks pretty false and I personally dont think that it looks that attractive. There's nothing wrong with a little makeup if that makes you feel comfortable but it should be to enhance what nature has given you, rather than to pretend that you are something else altogether.

My personal preference is for someone with a little class, rather than trash. There are many other men who feel the same. I would guess also that the sort of men that would be attracted to natural beauty are also those who are likely to respect you as a person and give you what you need from the relationship. You may not get the same from men that are easily attracted with many layers of cheap cosmetics.

Personally I think that the most attractive thing is when a woman has enough self belief to be able to present her true self without alteration.

We (men) may all turn our heads when we see a 'tarty' female walk by, we might even think that it is attractive - but it's not the sort of look that is what we want to come home to time after time. Many men would happily snog someone like that but I think that someone with a little more class is what we all really want tom come home to.

** as requested in the question, this is MY personal opinion, I am sure that it will differ from many other people and it is diversity that makes the world go round**

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (1 April 2009):

Only a very small precentage of men have it so easy.

Most others are struggling just as much as women on average if you counted careers & other things besides looks. Men's lives are unhappier than womens by most of the accurate statistics these days.

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A female reader, lotus mama808 United States +, writes (31 March 2009):

lotus mama808 agony auntI envy males, but for completely different reasons. They can pee standing up, never have to bleed out of their sex organs and experience menopause (sp?) or PMS, they never have to carry a baby for 9 months and watch their bodies get sucked dry the cute little bundle of joy. I could swear God is a man, (hehhheee). As for the slut thing, I am considered one of your typical young hippy chicks, and I am married to the most wonderful man who is nothing like me. I have never put on make-up, (I do shave though, but for my own personal satisfaction), I don't get dolled up, I work hard and it shows, and I was this way when I met my wonderful man. But, I am envious of the males. Guess we always want what we simply can't have;)

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (31 March 2009):

hey there...

I agree with other posters, there are lots, lots and lots of guys who prefer a normal, nice, caring girl. Most guys don't want a slut for a girlfriend. At least not the guys that are worth it.

I guess this post stems more from frustration. But really, nice guys are hard to find, because they are precious and a treasure once you do! You would not believe how sweet, understanding and mature some guys can be. The thing is, these guys are low key. So you won't be seeing them boasting about themselves, being loud or at every party... they usually have depper interests than just screwing girls and getting drunk at parties. These guys sure have fun, and they go to parties, but usually they are the ones that spend some time with their friends, chatting and dancing a little, not the drunk ones in boxers jumping off the roof into the pool!

Trust me, nice guys are out there. But you have to look a little closer... it's worth the effort because once you fall in love with a nice guy, you don't want to go back...

Trust me, I tell you this from experience.

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A male reader, Moviefan United States +, writes (31 March 2009):

Moviefan agony auntYou don't have to be sluts to get a boyfriend, you just are looking for the wrong type of guy or looking in the wrong places. If you go for jocks or bad boys of course they are going to respect you to put out because they are uncaring jerks most of the time who really only care about sex and getting a attractive girlfriend to make their social status bigger.

I don't have a girlfriend because i don't act like the generic male that girls always go for, because you think they have a lot self esteem or something. I have self esteem but i don't like being a cocky jerk or acting like im all that and use people.

A guy at my school filmed a underage girl while he was having sex with her without her knowledge(he was underage to) and he almost got tried as an adult and arrested because he showed a bunch of guys the video.

He still gets so many girls it makes me sick, you guys make us act like that to get anywhere, if you went for the guys who didn't expect you to be sluts it wouldn't be like that. Look in a mirror your part of the problem to.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (31 March 2009):

I totally get what you mean! a lot of Guys are all about girls flashing their bodies off all the time, and I don't see why it should have to be all about that.

I think there are some nice guys out there though, who do care about personality and dont just judge quickly! So Yeah, i do understand that perfectly though!

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A female reader, eyeswideopen United States +, writes (31 March 2009):

eyeswideopen agony auntSay what??? You think all girls with boyfriends are sluts? What planet do you live on? Aren't you a little old to be so naive?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (31 March 2009):

A guy may take a different view. Guys deal with like 40 times more testosterone than girls. How about that? Girls and guys need to understand each other more. Then we both will be happier. A girl needs a guy emotionally more than physically. But a guy needs a girl physically. So you give what your partner needs and you get what you need from your partner. That is mutual. Society has put unrealistic values on girls making them feel like sluts when they go about trying to earn the emotional bond they need. Similarly girls shouldnt think a guy who wants sex from them is using them or being shallow or anything like that. That is what he primarily wants and needs from a girl, just like you want romance from him. For some weird reason our ancestors thought romance is somehow holier than sex. That is baseless. If only we appreciate each other we both will be happier.

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