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female
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anonymous
writes: My bf and I have been together since highschool. We are now 2 yrs together and are studying at the same university and getting the same course. We've broken up in the past, gone through and survived a lot of problems. I love him very much and we want to get married after college. We will be entering our 2nd yr next term. He is a perfect bf for me. Loyal and honest. He always forgives me in my mistakes.My problem is I want to shift to a different course. He doesnt want me to because I promised him before that we would do our thesis together and be in this course together. We do make a good team and we get excellent grades. But I am no longer interested in this field and I want to shift out. I promised him we would still spend enough time together and I'd still help him out in his projects. But he wouldn't allow me and tells me we might break up if I still choose to shift. He makes me feel guilty because I'd be breaking my promise of doing our thesis together. I have broken many of my promises to him and I don't want to break another one. But I don't like this course anymore. What should I do? I don't want to lose him.
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female
reader, miss fit  +, writes (6 May 2007):
if he's using your feelings in this relationship to blackmail you then he doesn't really value it.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2007): How nice that he always 'forgives your mistakes'. I am sure he always makes sure you are aware of these 'mistakes' too. This man is a major league control freak. Get out while you can. If having someone tell you what to do with your life is 'perfect for you' ... well, that's up to you.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2007): What's more important, your future happiness being on a course you're more likely to enjoy and therefore get better grades at or an immature, controlling boyfriend who is stopping you from fulfilling your dreams and doing what is best for you? He should support you, not make you feel bad. You've hardly cheated or anything like that. I know which one I'd choose. Please dont stay miserable for the rest of your studies. You should be enjoying them. Who's to say you and your boyfriend will stay together anyway? I know you want to and I'm not saying you wont, but what if you didnt enjoy your course and get as good grades as you could but then split up with him anyway?Tell him you're changing, explain to him why you feel you need to and if he's not supportive and makes you feel guilty then is he really someone you want to be with?Good Luck
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A
male
reader, Dr Pete + ♥, writes (3 April 2007):
 A perfect boyfriend isn't going to threaten that the relationship could break up just because you want to change your course! Whilst it's great being on the same course as your partner, it is hardly the grounds for a successful relationship. You need to put yourself first and your boyfriend needs to grow up. Having changed your mind and wanting to do another course hardly constitutes breaking a promise, not really. There are far more important things in life to cause drama, seriously don't let this be one of them. Change your course and if he makes an issue out of it then perhaps you've misjudged him.
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A
female
reader, ruth2203 +, writes (3 April 2007):
he should support you what ever you decide to do even if hes not happy with it , my parents did the same degree and they did different things with it. If it what you really want tell your boyff its what you really want and that you want him there a 100% of the way and if hes not then leave him dont let him let you follow ur dreams x
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