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I don't want my heart broken again by him!

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Question - (3 July 2010) 1 Answers - (Newest, 10 July 2010)
A female United States age 36-40, *nelastchance writes:

I used to have a major crush on my best friend. He used to leave his girlfriends house to come to mine and we'd talk for hours. He ended up breaking up with her to spend more time with me.

I liked him but we never actually dated. We were together every night, texted each other 24/7, and everyone mentioned how we should be dating. We used to kiss to say goodbye, hello, and any other random time in between.

About 3 years ago we stopped talking. This May he contacted me, apologized for losing touch, and said he wanted to be my friend and make things right before he moved away...which was coming up fast.

He literally moved hundreds and hundreds of miles away. I saw him in person a few times before he moved, we talk online, and we constantly text each other. A week or so ago he asked me to come and see him because he had bought me something. Nothing serious, but it's something that we used to always talk about when we first became friends.

My friends are excited because they think that he's finally making up his mind that he wants to be with me...and I'm worried I'm just setting myself up for another letdown. Why would he ask me to come and see him and not the friends that he had when we weren't speaking? I don't understand where he's coming from and I don't want to drive all the way to see him to just end up brokenhearted once again.

View related questions: best friend, crush, text

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A female reader, RB92 United Kingdom +, writes (10 July 2010):

I apologize for the length of time its taken, and it might be that you've already been on this trip to see him. In which case I am here to support you from whatever resulted from that if you so wanted...

It sounds like you were very close to him - and in his eyes at least, the most important thing in the world. Given 3 years have passed since you last spoked however, I wouldn't set my hopes to high. But remember you must be pretty special to him even if its nothing romantic - how many people make the effort to see someone they haven't seen in 3 years?

Furthermore, if you still like him, and assuming hes not with anyone, why don't you make the effort you've always wanted to?

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