A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:hello aunts, never thought i would be on here. ive seen alot of people writing about age gap. im trying to understand my best friends relationship, ive known him since we were 20 years old. when he got married i was his best man, and the woman he married was 1 in a million. she took better care of him than she did herself. worked making good money, helped take care of bills, cleaned the house, cooked, carried to him everything he needed. he confided in me that he had met a girl at work last year, they started seeing each other and he said he was telling his wife that he was working late and seeing her instead. he said my wife is an amazing wife, but im in love with this girl and shes half my age. well in a nut shell she found out let him stay with hopes that he would give up on this girl and relize it was crazy. but when she discovered that he cared more about the girl than he did her she kicked him to the curb. he leased a place and moved her in. they are now engaged to be married. i know this is none of my business he said that his wife and family had told him that she was a gold digger, and out after his money, and asked what i thought. i know shes not working, he works, cleans, and cooks most of the meals. i just dont get it how can someone leave an amazing wife, knowing that the age gap is so large, its like dating your daughter, and he did have 2 step daughters with whom this girl in age fits between the two of them. can someone share some wisdom of thought on this, so that i know what to tell my friend. i have asked him to give me sometime to think on the matter so i dont put my foot in my mouth. i think its a huge mistake on his part. but he is not letting her work, and taking care of her so i dont know if he really wants to know the truth. tell me what you think.
View related questions:
at work, best friend, engaged, girl at work, money Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (13 September 2012):
 Is your friend asking for your opinion on his new romance?
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 September 2012): We all fall out of love, so if you married why should you stay in a marriage that does not bring you happiness. If they want someone to cook clean look after the home, then get a maid. Why should a person not be allowed to be set free and love the person they really want to be with.
I sometimes feel that people should stop being critical and not look at other peoples marriage through tinted glasses as only the person living with them knows the truth and whether they are happy.
They need to deal with the consequences of breaking their marriage and not those who stand on the oustide and be crtical.
...............................
A
male
reader, JustHelpinAgain  +, writes (13 September 2012):
You didn't mention sex! Middle age guys will often go on a do or die mission to find a younger model with much more sex "miles" in her. Also it sounds like he doesn't have kids with wife#1? He is still young enough to have his "own" family. And if these aren't good enough reasons then there is the shear madness of being headlessly in love again, and sought after by a beautiful younger woman! Not many men could resist that. Unfortunately the divorce and animosity with friends and family will soon tarnish his excitement. Most married men have a close shave with this happening to them, me included, and obviously if the love for your wife and children is strong enough then the thought of replacing them, making them incredibly unhappy, and never sharing in their lives again, is just untenable. I have known a couple of guys that did exactly what your friend did and I although they were not good friends I now have lost all respect for them.If he is a really good friend then talk with him and find whats motivating. If it is just sex and blind love then tell him he is a fool and he should work it out before he ends up a sad lonely old guy!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 September 2012): It sounds like he's going through a mid life crisis. I personally don't understand it but he will reap what hr sows. Karma is a b**ch! He will get his. This new woman doesn't work and she is milking your friend dry. He will cone back crawling to bis wife b/c he will learn that this girl is there for the ride. That ride ain't cheap. Guess where he will be running? For the sake of ur friendship only hang out with your friend. Don't get involved because it will cause a rift in your long friendship. If he wants you to come along with his new love politely decline. You cab inform him that you don't want to get involved with that and your friendship is just between the two if you and you don't have to hang with her and leave it at that. I hope your friend come back to bis senses but until then its best you stay out of it. Best of luck to you.
...............................
A
female
reader, Sugarbuns  +, writes (13 September 2012):
 Your friend is a fool. Call it a mid-life melt down. But sometimes it think when a man is with such a great catch (his wife of course) there's no challenge. She's perfect in every way. What he wants is a "project" and it would appear, that's exactly what he got. Someone he thinks he'll take care of, mold into something, and feel challenged to "fix her problems". Sure it'll be a train wreck, but he'll have to find that out the hard way. The damage has already been done and I hope his beautful wife finds herself in the arms of a wealthy, sexy man who will sweep her off her feet and pamper her for the rest of her life.
...............................
|
