A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Close to two years ago, i met a guy online. I took the initiative to send him a message on youtube when i saw his videos about depression, loneliness and anxiety (which i was going through at the time) and when i saw that he lived in the same country and city as me. He was my age and we got along right away and i felt a connection to him like i had never felt to anyone before. I could speak my heart out to him and tell him how i was feeling and he would understand and i would understand him. I honestly had no intention at the time of being more than friends or just having him as someone i could talk to. But time passed and even though i was reluctant at first, i stared seeing something more than a friend in him. He started being sweeter to me too and i was falling, against my better judgement. That's when i started thinking about meeting him personally, but i didn't have the courage to ask him out, so i chose to not say anything. Finally the time came when he did ask me out, but then cancelled. I chose to ignore this at the time and wait, because i could see he was not ready yet (since he was still suffering from anxiety). The thing is, close to two years have passed and he still hasn't asked me out ever since that first time. Not even for a casual friendly encounter. He started growing more distant even though we talk frequently and are still very close.I'm writing this today, because i found something that broke my heart: he went back to his ex months ago and didn't tell me anything,the fact that he chose to hide this from me is something i don't understand. He doesn't know that i know and i am currently wondering what i should do. His ex is not in the country currently and he changed his relationship status to "it's complicated" on facebook. He had told me about her before and how their relationship had always been troubled though.Part of me wants to tell him all that i'm feeling right now, and ask him what he really thinks of me but part of me doesn't, because it could mean the end of our friendship. Did he not tell me because he doesn't trust me enough? Did he not tell me because he sees me as something more in the future? Did he not tell me because he doesn't want me to be part of his real life?all of these questions have been running through my head all day. I'm thinking of asking him if why he never asked me out since that first time over a year ago. But i don't know what to do. I'm surprised at my own feelings since i don't know him personally (is it really possible to have feelings for someone you don't know..?)This is making me suffer more than i care to admit, and the fact that i still have lots of loneliness issues doesn't help, because all i can think about is how i'm going to end up friendless. Memories of our conversations and the times we were happy "together" keep coming to me. Sometimes i think i'm being extremely childish and that i'm actually just holding on to him because i'm lonely. But i honestly don't know anymore.What should i do?p.s. excuse any grammar mistakes, english is not my native language.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2013): Move on and forget him, two years of your romantic young life is just too much to waste on ANYBODY, LET GO, he will only use you if and when he feels upset again.
A
female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (9 August 2013):
 STOP all contact if you CAN'T just be a friend. He sees you as just a friend or person he knows on the internet and I suspect that is why he cancelled seeing you in person. Because he guessed you liked him more then he likes you.
Go out and be with friends, hang out, get some hobbies and MEET people out there in the "REAL LIFE" you will have a better chance of meeting someone.
And lastly I think he has been "using" you as someone to make him feel good about himself without thinking how you felt.
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