A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I've being in a relationship with someone for three years. And recently, I was caught cheating on this person. I feel terrible, I feel like a scum bag for betraying this person's trust. I really love the life we had together, the companionship, and over all the relationship. Our sex life was really at it's lowest in the last months of our relationship, so instead of communicating that, I just went outside of my relationship and for it. I know he's devastated, broken-hearted and doesn't want to see or talk to me. I know he still love's me, and I love him. I'm just not sure why I threw it all away. The worst part about it is that I know I hurt him, and those were not my intentions. I'm wandering if he'll be able to forgive me, and most importantly, I wander if him and I can ever be together again? What can I do to better my self? The idea that it's over has not sinked in for me, and I feel very alone, very scare, remorseful, guilty, shameful, but oddly enough relief that the "secret" is finally out. HELP!
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female
reader, johannabanana +, writes (20 July 2010):
 This person still loves you and if they have seemed like the forgive type in the 3 years you've been together and not the type of person to hold grudges then it is possible he may be able to forgive you one day. Right now he is extremely hurt and doesn't think he can ever put faith in you again. Try to talk to him. Tell him you knew what you did was wrong and you still don't understand fully why you did it... Maybe you should offer to go to some therapy sessions. Also if he ever forgives you and wants to be together it may be a good idea to bring up the idea of a relationship councilor so the reasons why you were unhappy can be resolved in the future.
A
female
reader, Denizli  +, writes (20 July 2010):
 Yeah, cheating sucks! especially afterwards.I've cheated on my bf and it really feels bad afterwards. I wished I never did it, he doesn't know anything about that and I think he never will.. I think I will just let it go and I decided I won't do it again in my life because I wouldn't like to be cheated on.Life is made of this.. mistakes! I can completely understand how you feel, the guilt kills you.If you still love your guy I think you shouldn't let him go, just give him some time alone and give urself some time to think things and to decide what to do next, he may forgive you or not, you can't really blame him if he doesn't cause you know its bad what you've done but let's see.I wish you luck and I hope you can solve your problems!
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