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I can't seem to stop flirting with other men, and I sometimes question my love for him!

Tagged as: Gay relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (15 August 2008) 3 Answers - (Newest, 15 August 2008)
A male United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I have been with my bofriend (i'm gay by the way) for 10 months now, and I love him to bits, but despite this, I cannot help but flirt with other men and I cant seem to stop it, i dont know what it is whether I just like the attention (I suffered from a severve lack of confidence and self esteem when I was younger). When i'm not with my boyfriend sometimes I question whether i love him, being with some else seems more appealing. Im confused, I dont know why I am like this, I dont want to loose my boyfriend he is the best thing in my life.

View related questions: confidence, flirt, self esteem

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A reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2008):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thanks for the replys, its strange I never thought about how I would feel if he did the same or how he feels. I think I expected the kind of answers I got but I just needed to hear them for myself. So, thanks again. I'm definately going to pack in all the flirting, and just flirt with my boyfriend instead - A part of me thinks I just need a bit of a change in the relationship, spice things up again like at the beginning.

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A female reader, ewwwitszoe United States +, writes (15 August 2008):

imagine if your boyfriend did this and you found out.

how would you feel?

I would be heartbroken.

I had a boyfriend who flirted with other girls constantly.

it bugged me to hell.

so just think,

or you can ignore all the other cuties and stay with your sweetie and see how it goes.



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A female reader, dreamflower United States +, writes (15 August 2008):

dreamflower agony auntFirst of all you ahve to ask yourself why you feel compelled to flirt so much. If it's because you simply crave attention, then maybe your current paramour isn't satifying those needs for you. Perhaps talking with him can't give him a way to better meet your needs as a partner and lover. If it's because you find these other men much more attractive, then maybe you should take a hard look at your relationship. It would be foolish to think a relationship like this can exist without physucal attraction. And if your finding other men much more attractive to the point of changing your behavior, then maybe your current paramour isn't meeting your needs. Most importantly, you ahve to figure out how much this relationship means to you. If you care enough about him to withstand all odds, then I think you should make a conscious, honest effort to improve things. If you really think you'd be better off persuing someone else, than it really is best to end the relationship, instead of trailing him along emotionally. It's not fair to him and your only limiting yourself. Good luck!

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