| A
female
age
16-17,
anonymous
writes: I am trying to get over a guy i slept with back in december. I've really tried but i can't seem to get over him. I'm putting on a brave face at school but the truth is that i can't take it anymore. I hate him for everything he put me through but at the same time I want him to understand how i'm feeling. Is this just me being stupid? Why can't i move on a forget him? I need some help. Please!
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female
reader, birdynumnums  + ♥, writes (26 January 2008):
 I'm so sorry Hun. Some guys at that age can be total s&%@heads. Unfortunately, girls tend to lead with their hearts, and some guys take advantage of that. Everyone makes mistakes when it comes to putting your faith and trust in someone else, and it hurts to be disappointed. It's not fun when you have slept with someone else and it doesn't mean anything to him. Like Yos said, don't give him the satisfaction of letting him know that this has bothered you. Just chalk it up to being one of life's mistakes, we all make them.
There is a theory that you should make a guy wait at LEAST two months, if not longer, to make sure that you have a strong relationship with a guy before you have sex. If you have sex before that, they tend to view the relationship as a sex thing and not as a relationship. This is the reason why I think it's easier to wait until Uni, when your not bumping into the same people all the time in the halls, to consider having sexual relationships.
Like Waterloo Sunset said, consider the whole thing as if you have dodged a bullet here. If he has treated you this badly, you'd be even worse off if you were stuck with the guy. Feel sorry for his next girlfriend, she's probably going to need a friend soon considering the way that guy treats women.
Every time he pops into your head - think "FORGET YOU!" - Heck, say it out loud! Eventually, your heart will catch up with your head and mouth. Time helps us move on. You certainly didn't deserve to be treated that way, and you deserve to be loved and cherished in return. Wait for the right guy, he's out there somewhere! Take care!
A
male
reader, Richard_EMids  +, writes (26 January 2008):
 Take note of how you are feeling and learn the lesson for the future. Casual sex does not suit your personality. In fact sex is very special to you and for you must be linked to love.
Take care, Richard
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 January 2008): At your age the sex thing is just that with guys, a thing! Some (not all!) can have it with anyone just have no feelings so you need to just put this down to experience. Forget about it if you can, take each day as it comes and it will get better. But dont dwell over it and just stop whittling, if he doesnt want to know you anymore, then fine, look on it as a lucky escape. You are young and there will be loads of romances in the future, just try and have a more light hearted approach to things and dont sleep around!
take care
xx
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A
male
reader, Yos  + ♥, writes (26 January 2008):
 He's not going to understand how you're feeling, so wishing he would is just going to drag this out and make you hurt even more. Many (maybe most) guys at your age have a really different take on sex to girls. Honestly he's probably now lusting over someone else. Don't give him the satisfaction of knowing you're still hung up on him.I suggest staying away from guys for a while and focussing on your studies, your girl friends and having fun doing what you like to do. These feelings will fade naturally in time, the best thing you can do in the mean time is distract yourself and get on with your life.You'll see this next bit of advice given out over and over again on this site: it's really worth waiting (and waiting and waiting if necessary...) before having sex with a guy to see if he really likes you. The guys that truly want to be your boyfriend will be willing to wait and get to know you better before having sex, whilst the ones (like this guy) that just want some sex will get bored and move on. It's the tried and tested method of weeding out the ones you don't want. One to remember for next time.
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