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I can't feel any love for my boyfriend any more, I've sufferred depression, do you think this is the cause? I still want to be with him but I feel numb...

Tagged as: Dating, Faded love, Health, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (21 February 2007) 4 Answers - (Newest, 22 November 2008)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

This is so wierd but for some reason i just cant feel love for my boyfriend anymore. I know however that i want to love him, and he is the only person i want to spend my days with but lately i havent been able to feel emotion, ive been numb. A couple months ago ive battled a severe depression and i still have moderate depression, could this be whats altering my emotions.

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A female reader, bonbon Jordan +, writes (22 November 2008):

bonbon agony auntI really don't know what should i say to help..what i know is iam just a fool to feel the same way and maybe more...i had a great person who shared me love..but i've never felt the same for him..and what kills me every single day is i really respect him and i don't wanna loose him at all..but i feel that iam such a lier and cheater for not being honest with him..what should i do ? and how can i be good for him as he is for me?

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (1 August 2007):

Yes I have felt the same way. Me and my wife are expecting a child and I can't feel anything. I know it has to be the depression. I mean when i found out it was a boy i was so excited and ready. Now I can't feel love for either one of them and it scares me. I know I want for us to be a happy family. I know I want to spend the rest of my life with my wife. I just wish all could stop. I have been on antidepressants off and on for 3 or 4 years. I have recently got back on zoloft and I had one good week after i was told to change my dose to 150mg. But now it seems i have gotten worse. Zoloft has worked in the past for me. I dont understand why it isnt now.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2007):

I am in the same boat as you, i am recovering from depression and i feel like i dont love my boyfriend anymore but i know i do. Im trying to get on with things i just keep thinking nothing that bad you cant get over there is always something worse out there. I know its the depression thats effected my feelings and its proberbly the same for you, you start to think different things and it is the depression thats making you feel like this. Im feeling a lot better now and the feelings are coming back and im sure yours will to.

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A female reader, Carina South Africa +, writes (21 February 2007):

Carina agony auntYes, it's quite likely that your battle with depression has affected your emotions. Depression is a serious illness and affects your brain chemically. It takes a while to get over, so don't be too hard on yourself. If you're on anti-depressants they can alter your emotions too, often making you feel a bit 'numb'. It sounds to me as though you still have the right feelings there, because you want to spend time with him, but they're probably not quite so intense because of your illness. Try not to worry about it and just enjoy his company. I'm certain your feelings will come back to an even keel in a while. You could also speak to your doctor about this next time you see him/her.

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