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I am turned off by my girlfriends vagina aroma, How do I talk about this?

Tagged as: Gay relationships, Health, Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (4 March 2013) 4 Answers - (Newest, 8 March 2013)
A female United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

I am a gay female and I have currently been seeing a woman for the past 4 months. We have been taking it slow, and recently have begun to get more comfortable with one another.

Anyways, we were playing a sexy lovers board game to get closer, and loosen up, as both of us are a bit shy. During part of the game, one of the cards was for her to play with herself, and me watch. We did, after her legs were open for awhile and she was getting the juices flowing, I noticed a very pungent vagina aroma....this was the first time I had ever seen her nude or in a sexual way, so I did not want to say anything. The thing is, the smell was NOT BAD. She has good hygiene and takes care of herself. It was just the smell of wetness was just much stronger than what I am used to, and I am afraid if I go to have oral sex I will be grossed out. Most women I have been with had a more faint odor. I have been with different races, and know that diet and hygienic routines play a part, but I have never experienced this in an intimate setting. I think she just lets off a strong smell as she is getting arosed because otherwise, we have kissed, cuddled, massaged one another and she smells nice and fresh. It is just am very sensitive to smells, especially different human body odors. The smell of some people literally makes me feel sick, and I fear this. I don't want to avoid intimacy, but how can I tell her that her aroma turns me off. I know she has perfect hygiene and does not have an infection/STD/etc. It is her own personal sexual smell, I feel so bad to bring it up! HELP!!!

View related questions: oral sex, shy, vagina

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A female reader, TwanasKarma United States +, writes (8 March 2013):

TwanasKarma agony auntAre you engaged in the practice of safe sex? If yes, then you have recent medical documentation of your partner's gynocological exam and std testing results which support your claim that she's std and yeast infection free, right? If you don't, ask yourself, "Why is it that I have such little respect and appreciation for myself and the value of my life that I will recklessly engage in sexual activity with a woman whose vagina is reeking pungent fumes, those of which are typical of a yeast infection or std which I am clueless as to whether or not she carries because I am not a practicer of safe sex?" Another thing, how do you know she isn't thinking the same thoughts about your vagina aroma? Just because you might think your vagina smells like roses, doesn't mean others agree. Ask your partner to describe your vaginal aroma. I'm betting she, in turn, will request you do the same for her; that's your open. Scratch and sniff is a lottery game; Lick and sniff is russian roulette. Love, respect and value yourself. Practice safe sex. TwanasKarma

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2013):

A 'strong' odor is almost always a sign that something is wrong. She needs to see a doctor and be tested for bacterial vaginosis and trichomonaisis.

Women who share toys can spread sexually transmitted infections. If she is positive, you may want to take antibiotics at the same time so you don't continually reinfect one another.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2013):

Slow down cowboy,the last thing you want to do is tell some woman that her feminine odor "turns you off!" Especially if you have intentions to have oral sex in the future! Or any kind of sex for that matter!

Women have to be careful about upsetting the natural pH balance in the vagina. A simple douche, avoiding anything too acidic or harsh, does the trick. She may have just ended her menstrual cycle around the time you both had that intimate session. We all have smells that are unique and individual. You said the odor was "not Bad?" Just pungent???

Have you ever noticed that at the end of the day, you have a muskier odor in the crotch area? This is due to a collection of sweat and accumulated moisture over the course of a day. The simple remedy, a fresh shower.

If you do decide to have sex at some point, initiate love-making with a shower together. She didn't have the opportunity to "freshen up;" so you may be drawing the wrong conclusion about her feminine odor. This is only one spontaneous and single incident.

Lastly, do not verbalize comparisons of other women to her! Unless you are conducting a legitimate survey on feminine hygiene. If you have a sensitivity to odors, you can simplify the situation if you don't go south. Keep your head above her waist. You can only assume she has good hygiene. If you get sick, that would embarrass the both of you. I'd think twice before going any further. This may be a sign you may want to avoid intimacy altogether.

How are you certain she has no STD or an infection? You've clearly indicated you don't know the reason for the smell. Offensive feminine odor IS the result of poor feminine hygiene, possible infection, or an STD. An unusually smelly vagina is not normal. You're skating on thin ice.

Use condoms in any case. Better yet, just be friends.

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A male reader, teddy 19 United Arab Emirates +, writes (4 March 2013):

if its all natural it wouldnt be proper for you to bring it up thats where loving someone comes into play you have to accept her part and parcel mehn......unless you dont love her

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