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I am not coping at all with our 2 year old son since he isn't around to help me!

Tagged as: Family, The ex-factor, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (8 May 2007) 3 Answers - (Newest, 9 May 2007)
A female United Kingdom age 51-59, anonymous writes:

How can i get my ex to see how much he's hurting me?

He fails to see how much im in love with him. I cant turn my feelings on and off and to add to my misery our son, whom is 2yrs old, is such a handful and all the signs point to ADHD and there is nobody to give me a break exept his dad.

Since we fell out im falling deeper into depression as he hasnt even bothered to concider how much i need his help, even making my bed is exhausting with our son. I know he himself is under pressure right now but i just cant cope alone. I dont even want to wake up in the morning as i know what lies ahead, but having my partner around made it bearable. How can i stop this feeling? i cry everyday and everyday gets worse.

View related questions: a break, my ex

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (9 May 2007):

Your ex isnt your current partner.Therefore he wont be around. Do you need your ex only because you need help? Would you miss your ex as much if you didn`t have your son? The most important thing here is to get this properly diagnosed and move forward from there. If you have just broken up,he will probably feel uncomfortable just now and will probably want to make arrangements as soon as the dust settles. First important thing is to seek help or expert advice. Good luck.

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A female reader, Pork Hock Canada +, writes (9 May 2007):

Hi Brit girl here. Why do you need your ex? Why aren't you dealing with the face value...forget about your ex for the moment. Start teaching yourself what your sons' world is everyday. Who says he has ADHD? Labels come quickly on children when they have lost a parent. Just for you to want to know, you should what to know the symptological results before you know how to move on. I really want to help and I am a single Mum have tons to share and give you the answers.

Just want to make sure you and your son is stepping in the right track...you don't need your husband unless he recognises his child needs support. It may just be a reaction to the breakup no ADHD...be a positive role model and research it, then ask you ex for help if required. Hope that helps. L

As for the ex, let that part of your life and concentrate on getting your little boy properly diagnosed.

Then I can help you with lots! PROMISE. All the best xo

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A male reader, Royofthe Rovers United Kingdom +, writes (9 May 2007):

Royofthe Rovers agony auntThe first thing you need to take care of is yourself here before you can move onto the problems with your son.

Go and see your doctor and tell him your situation. he might put you on anti-depressants but that is only short term and wont be the answer to your problem. You need to speak to someone, ideally a counsellor or physo-therapist who can give you the correct guidance you need right now.

You have alot on your plate and it is clear you can not count on your ex for support, even tho he should be helping you through this tough time. You are not going to help your child in the state of mind you in at the moment, so you need to sort yourself out for the sake of yourself and your son.

Losing someone you love is tough enough, but you need to focus on the good things in your life, such as the child you are bringing into this world.

The longer you leave it the more you son wil feel the effects of you as you fall into depression. Please, please, please seek some outside hwlp if not from family than from a professional source.

Deep down you know you have to do this.

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