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I am feeling so insecure regarding his ex!

Tagged as: The ex-factor, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (23 October 2008) 5 Answers - (Newest, 10 November 2008)
A female United States age 51-59, *jm1214 writes:

Dear Cupid,

I have been in a relationship for about 7 months now. We fell for each other instantly! He is one of the sweetest men I have ever met, we click so well, that we are now living together. Everything seems to be going extremely well, except one thing. He has an ex-fiance and that relationship ended just a month before we met. I worry that he isn't quite over her and I have asked him about this. He says that he has never loved anyone as much as he loves me and that his former girlfriend was not the one he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. He is constantly reassuring me about my doubts, but it still nags at me. I'm not the jealous type at all, but I was in a marriage for many years and my husband was unfaithful on several occasions. I ended the marriage because of his cheating. My question is this...Am I feeling insecure in my new relationship because of what happened in the past? Am I doubting my current boyfriends love for me because of a past betrayal? I really don't want to be this way, I need to forget about the bad stuff, I know, but I just can't shake the feeling regarding his ex. IS it because he went from one serious relationship to another so quickly? He says he never thought it would happen so fast, but it did. What do you think? Is it possible to fall in love so fast?

View related questions: his ex, insecure, jealous

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A reader, anonymous, writes (10 November 2008):

good to hear its all gotten bettter for you hun :D xx

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (4 November 2008):

Yes the kissing and also talking are going well. I am feeling a litle less insecure about our relationship now. He is always reassuring and understanding, so hopefully we can look towards the future "together" and forget about the past.


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A reader, anonymous, writes (4 November 2008):

hows it going hunny?

have you gotten anywhere with the kissing trial?

or has it worked so well that you cant get your hands offa each otehr to write an update ?! xxx

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A female reader, rjm1214 United States +, writes (24 October 2008):

rjm1214 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thanks, for the advice about kissing. We do kiss alot, but I never thought about it in that way. I'll give it a try!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (23 October 2008):

it is possible to fall in love so fast, i met my current partner after a rocky relationship, and he had the same nags and worries as you do,

i knew i loved him after just a month of dating , we were actually considering staring a family after just 6 months, i know it sound really rushed, but we were perfect for each other after such a short time ,

we are now living together, have a 2yr old daughter and are as happy and inlove as ever ....i was really worried when i fell in love with him so soon, 4 yrs on, it worked out the best thing that ever happend.

if your still worried about what he might be feeling about his ex, do something about it , make sure you kiss him for over a minute at least 3 times aday, any feelings he may be unsure of with be blown away and you will be all he can think about and you both may even fall in love all over again ...........

the reason why i say for over a minute is because you dont actually realise how little time you spend kissing some one you love , a kiss is actually a healing band aid on any relationship . as small as it may seem .

so get kissing and see how your feelings improve and good luck xxxx

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