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I am being horribly bullied by my ex housemates and I don't know what to do

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Question - (21 June 2012) 12 Answers - (Newest, 28 June 2012)
A female Ireland age 36-40, anonymous writes:

Hey guys,

Just looking for a little support. My head is about to explode.

Recently I lived with two people, a guy and a girl I would have considered friends.

Some messy events lead to me them moving out and me loosing A LOT of money. Including:

The guy bringing a guy back to the house, sleeping with him on the sofa and then pretending nothing happened and no one was in the house after I had come out of my room upset due to the stranger walking into my room whilst I was asleep, waking me up by turning the lights on and standing over me, NAKED and holding his penis.

The guy moving out (without an apology) owing me 2 months rent and electricity bills adding up to nearly 300 euros.

The girl who seemed to be there for me after such a shocking event, suddenly started standing me up at the last minuet and lying to me about where she was going and who she was seeing (She was meeting with the male housemate). I had no problems with this at all, and she knew that.

Then telling me two Mondays ago that she was moving home (four hours away) due to home sickness on that Thursday. Despite 2 months remaining on our joint lease.

She also told me she had told the landlord and that it was not affecting me. Turns out she never told them and I lost my deposit to pay for the rent she wasn't covering that month as we had a joint lease. Which was 425 euros. She was also only moving 15 mins down the road to live with the guy who upset me.

They've also been bullying me online stating that I'm annoying, obnoxious and that I think I know everything. Which a lot of people who know me have objected to.

I met the girl today to ask her if she'd give me the money and she freaked out and said I was ridiculous. And she insists that we have two separate leases, even though I have it on my table now as we type and it's defiantly a shared lease and I've explained it to her several times. And that she was going to "take this further", which I don't know how she can, because I owe her nothing.

I'm so stressed out. I'm not looking for legal information. Just to see if anyone besides those two thinks I'm in the wrong. I try very hard to be a nice person and their comments are crushing me a little. I don't think I should pay her rent for this month because she didn't give anyone notice.

Any opinions?

View related questions: bullied, crush, money, my ex

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A female reader, deirdre Ireland +, writes (28 June 2012):

hi, thanks for the update. 28 euros, whats that going to pay for (!) at least its something small, you probably can do with any money you get right now. yes keep proceeding with the case, you have every right and the online bullying just goes to show how nasty these people really are.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (28 June 2012):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thanks for the thought deirdre, means a lot.

So far I only have a little news. I got a check in the post from the guy. For 28 euros! Hmmm! Insult? But still better than nothing.

And I'm filling in the forms to slap the girl with a Civil Case :D

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A female reader, deirdre Ireland +, writes (28 June 2012):

yes please let us know how you get on, I hope it works out ok and it must be so stressful for you right now. do nothing about the gas bill, its the least she could pay for x

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A reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2012):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thanks you guys,

I'll let you all know what happens in the end. It may take a few weeks to get to court but I won't forget to update you.

And to deirdre, it is a nightmare. The gas at least is in the girls name. She left just over two weeks ago and still does not seem to have cancelled her gas bill. She's very irresponsible and I doubt it's even on her mind. So I'm happy to keep it that way until the deposit is sorted out ;).

Thanks all for the kind words and the luck.

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A female reader, deirdre Ireland +, writes (23 June 2012):

I hope you sort it out... also would it help to have a word with the landlord/housing authority? block them online so that they have no choice but to communicate to you face to face like normal adults, should they actually have something to say. it sounds like a total nightmare, hope the bills are not in your name. good luck.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (22 June 2012):

Honeypie agony auntGood Luck!

I'm proud you didn't just take the abuse from these people.

I hope you win and that THEY grow up a little.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (22 June 2012):

You ended up with assholes dude. I would take it to court. Atleast then you get your money back. If you have the contract then you should be fine in court. It seems that they've violated whatever agreement you guys had.

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A female reader, birdynumnums Canada +, writes (22 June 2012):

birdynumnums agony auntYAY You!

Proud of you.

Give 'em hell.

:^D

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A reader, anonymous, writes (22 June 2012):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Hehehe. Birdynumnums your post made me smile. I am absolutely a coward and I think that's exactly what I needed to be told.

And you both you and Anonymous 123. I am seeking legal help. I have contacted Citizens information and they have booked me in with someone for free legal advice. Things are a little complicated in this matter though, as the landlords have the only signed lease (I have a cope, but it was never signed) and they seem to have "misplaced it". Only the girl's name is on the lease. I intend to get as much evidence as possible that I paid half of the deposit and that she broke our contract resulting in me loosing money. Then I intend to take her to the small claims court.

Where the guy is concerned there was never any paper work he was a friend of both of ours and we said he could have the spare room for X amount of rent and that he split bills with us. It would by my word against both of theirs so I think I'd probably loose that one. But I'll ask about it when I go to the Free Legal Advice center next week.

Thanks for giving me a kick up the bum. And Honeypie, no need to worry, I have no risen to their childish internet antics and I won't.

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A female reader, Anonymous 123 Italy +, writes (22 June 2012):

Anonymous 123 agony auntOP stop being foolish and emotional about this and get up and take charge. From what you've told us, they are absolutely in the wrong. You have the legal paper work so you can claim your rights, you don't have to wait for them to do anything. They are just threatening you because you're getting scared and behaving like a coward.

Stand up for your rights, enough is enough! Get hold of the guy and demand legal action. 300 euros is a lot of money to let go. Same with the girl, dont engage in any more conversations or get drawn into arguments, just do what's to be done. Dont be ridiculous and let their comments bother you, be sensible about this. Please get legal help.

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A female reader, birdynumnums Canada +, writes (22 June 2012):

birdynumnums agony auntYOU are being a total COWARD. You are NOT in the wrong at all.

You are RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Stop letting these two ASSHOLES walk all over you.

Not only do you have the legal right to prosecute, you are morally in the right as well. They are big bitches and total douchbags.

GET LEGAL HELP.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (22 June 2012):

Honeypie agony auntIgnore then online, block them, un-friend them, delete them and DO not get into it online or anywhere else with these people.

Seems like you had bad luck with BOTH your room mates.

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