A
male
age
36-40,
*illrogers
writes:i posted a question a while ago about how my ex girlfriend was hurt by her new boyfriend and how she came to me for comfort. i also feared that he would do it again but chose not to say anything as i felt my advice would fall on deaf ears. however, i have recently learned that he has been cheating on her frequently and have actually seen him out with this other girl on more than one occasion. unfortunately i still love her, something which she is well aware of, and i dont think she would believe me and would begin to resent me for telling her something like that. should i say something or should i keep quiet and let it continue.
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female
reader, Farris +, writes (26 February 2007):
 I would steer clear of the situation. Because she's your ex, people would just see you meddling and think you're doing it for yourself, rather than your ex. On the other side of the coin though, DO NOT lie about it. If she asks you straight out whether you have see her guy cheating on her, you MUST tell the truth.
Be shoulder to cry on for her, but don't get personally involved.
I know it feels like crap to see someone hurting those you love, but she'll learn that he's no good for her in the long run.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 February 2007): For me however, even if I was in love with my ex, I wouldn't tell her anything. I would let her find out on her own, if ever she finds out on her own. The reasoning behind this is that she is no longer a part of me. She and/or I chose to separate for a reason. Unless this was a life or death situation, or something that may cause a whole crap load of negatives, I would leave it.
Some people... No, a lot of people can never learn without pain. A lot of people can never appreciate things without going through pain. If you're in there, stirring up trouble, you will be marked as a negative, even if the result is that she finds out her bf is a bastard.
Mind you, this is me, and my personal advice. Kenny also makes a good point. Either way, you can make your own choice in any degree of course.
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A
male
reader, kenny + ♥, writes (26 February 2007):
 If you still love your ex then i would tell her about her current boyfreind cheating on her.
Initially she will be very upset, but over time will thank you for telling her. Otherwise the relationship would have no doubt gone on with him making a fool of her.
Be there for her and comfort her through a difficult time.
Good luck
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