A
male
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Hi Im 13 and also Gay. I realised I was when I was thinking about my Best Friend and realised I fancied him but he's straight and always talked about his relationship problems and said his mum caught him watching porn but Is this just something to cover that he is gay because it's against his religon or is he actually straight?Another problem is that I've got a shy problem but it's always with guys and the only reason I talked to my best friend is because he talked to me first and my friends I hang out are my Guy Cousin and his friends that are all straight and now I have to move school because my cousin is making everybody call me gay even though they don't know and my cousin is just saying it because I am gay but because my gay personality it's hard for them to think of me as straight. But how will I make friends at my new school if I'm nervous around guys?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 April 2010): I don't know if you'll like what I have to say
One of my very best friends is gay. He had a really hard time with it at prep school but when he moved to high school (a guys boarding school) he decided he was "bi". He never admitted to it, and even dated quite a few girls - basically he acted straight.
He's a great guy and managed to make a lot of friends. I think acting straight allowed him to relax and make friends.
A while ago (two and a half years into high school) he came out the closet. To everyone. To his parents, his friends, his church... the works.
He said that it was the greatest feeling ever, because he already had friends then, people he could trust. And when he came out at school a lot of the guys came up to him and said that they had not had respect for gay men before but because he was such a great guy, and his being gay had not "affected" the friendship building because they didn't know, made it easier to make friends with him & they had gained respect for gay men & had a different perspective on it.
Being gay is hard, and it's so important not to be disrespected for it or hated for it. Some people you meet will just be homophobes and there is nothing you can do about it.
I don't know if my friend's story serves to uplift you and reassure you that it's possible to make friends and lead a normal fulfilled high school life, or serves as advice. I think that is a decision you need to make yourself.
I wish you much luck & may you prosper.
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