A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I am almost 40 and divorced. Nothing traumatic, we just drifted away after 20 years of being together. But I a really out of practice!I'm falling in love with a guy whom I met a couple of weeks ago (my age, as far as I know not married, but who knows these days). He's working on a project for our firm and will be gone in less than a month. In a way he is my superior - that's the first problem. The second one is - women absolutely adore him and he doesn't even try. So now I am wandering if I have just fallen under his spell. However, there are signs that he might be interested. He's polite to everyone, but with me he's extra nice, finds reasons to come and see me, spend time with me, causally touch me. He's not like that with anybody else. As he'd come recently and doesn't really know anyone that well he cannot safely ask around about me (I don't have social network profiles). So from time to time he would ask me questions, directly or indirectly. One day he said he had a problem with my car insurance certificate (he needed to check something for the firm, so he took certificates from everybody). Long story short, he said he called them and that they had never heard of me. Then he started asking me a lot of questions and somewhere in the middle of his list was - if the last name on certificate was my married name or maiden's name. I think (am not sure) he wanted to know if I was married. He's explanation for the confusion was pretty thin - looking at mine certificate he called the wrong number. Anyway, this is just an example of kind of questions he would ask from time to time.When he speaks to me he speaks in a "sing-song" voice and he's completely unaware of it. He sounds completely differently when he speaks to others (even women who are head over heels with him). He makes a lot of eye contact, but moves from my eyes to my mouth. When he finds an excuse to work from my office, he finds a way to strike up a conversation ... I don't mind being in love with him even if it's not "real". I have no expectations and this emotion has really brought back a spring into my step :) But... I wouldn't also like to miss something just because I am out of practice when it comes to dating. If he is going to do something, my guess is that he would do it when he is about to leave. I do not think I should initiate anything, but be open... I have no idea what I am doing. Any advice would be appreciate it :)Of course, he could be married... and I am not interested in that kind of a relationship. He spends a lot of time working. He's hours are such that I don't know when he has time to sleep.Thanx!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2016): Thank you for your answers :)
The second one made me laugh...
I guess I'll wait until the end of his project and if he doesn't do something, I will :)
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (30 April 2016):
 If a lady buys me a new car, or arranges for us to take an expensive vacation.... I always conclude that she's interested in me.....
Does that give you some ideas?
Good luck
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A
female
reader, wrathykins  +, writes (30 April 2016):
 Trust your gut with this. If you feel someone is interested in you, they probably are!
Just ask him if he fancies going for a few drinks after work one day. Play it cool, and just ask him. If his reply is "Yeah of course" then you know. If he says "Ah I can't sorry" and gives an excuse, and doesn't say he can the next day or anything, then you will know he's not interested.
I always think it's better to know for sure than always be wondering what if, so go for it! And if you do end up going for a few drinks with him, that gives you opportunity to find out more about him, I'm hopeful you won't find out he's married. Good luck!
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