A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi,my cousin is so judgemental and always interferes, even though we never chat and haven't done so in many years.If i have an issue with somebody else and mind you, a legitimate issue, she sees it fit to interfere and stick up for anybody else, but me.I'm so sick of it and i have never said anything to her, because i'll probably come out the bad guy and because i don't want to give her that satisfaction.Last time, via fb, i had real hardcore porn posted to my page and i cannot even share with you all as to how graphic the image was, but you can all use your imagination.Anyway, the post stated that one of my Uncle's posted the image, so i took matters into my own hands and i wrote a msg via my fb page stating that i know who did this and they know who they are i will report this to the Police.She then sent me a private msg, telling me off, saying that i should stop playing the victim because it's not only me who's having to deal with it, but our Uncle too.She actually told me that, our Uncle, he's the real victim here, not me and she said it with a real vehement tone. She then said, our Uncle's a Pastor so why would he do this?She then added, this image has been sent to us all and we're all aware of it and it wasn't our Uncle who did it, but somebody else because his accounts been hacked.Then, another male cousin wrote me a private msg via fb stating that our Uncle was a Pastor and wouldn't do such a thing.All i know is that my Uncle's name was above the porn post, so what was i to think?Btw, my 4 year old niece was sitting on my knee and saw the image when i opened up my fb page, hence my reaction.I feel that i cannot even make mention of the truth, the fact as i saw it, without being judged unfairly by my cousin's, who my brother and i haven't had the closest relationship with in years because one of our Aunties, married to my dad's brother has caused massive rifts on my dad's side of the family.It all started, according to my Mum, when she was very jealous of my Mum from day one and even my Dad's dad (her FIL) didn't really like her.Anyway, this Aunty, she's always accused my Mum of being easy and she's jealous of her husband liking my Mum, because he's a real ladies man, so the issue has never really been my Mum, but her husband, my Uncle, so this is where all this stuff actually stems from.I'm sick of being judged and rejected by so many family members, because they all take sides with my cousin's who don't even know the facts.Dad's side of the family, they're all pretty chummy with each other, but my family and i, we're more the odd men out.I think Mum and Dad do talk to a number of relatives and they're all getting on, but i seem to have difficulty separating what transpired in the past vs the present.Any advice is welcomed and will be appreciated.Thanks!
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (9 November 2017):
 Well it is well known that Facebook does carry these hackers that put pornographic pictures up on your page from one off your friends, so yes I do agree that you shouldn't have slated your Uncle here on Social Media but instead blocked it and asked him via the phone. So I do see why your cousin reacted the way she did as well. I get you had a child present but am afraid that is the danger off the internet. The only advice I can give you here is block that side off your family from facebook if you do not want to be dealing with them. As for face to face be as friendly as you can and try not to get involved in any drama.
A
male
reader, TylerSage  +, writes (9 November 2017):
 Don't get so worked up over this. It's gonna be you against the family. Kill em with kindness. Don't waste your energy on starting altercations, rise above it. When they aim low, you aim high. Who knows what this Uncle of yours is up to on his PC. It could have been the handy work of a shifty virus or your Uncle could visit porn sites.
Pastors have a harder time dealing with the sins of the earth and are much more susceptible because they are expected to be better and do better but they're human too and have weaknesses. Just forget it and ask her how she's doing or ignore her. Blocking her can lead to bigger issues down the line. Family can be a pain but they're still family.
All the best.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (9 November 2017):
 Block her... You don't HAVE to be "friends" with her on Facebook.
TRUST me the sooner you REMOVE and block her... the sooner you will stop having to worry about her judgments.
And maybe someone DID hack your uncle's account - it DOES happen. So if crap comes across your page you don't WANT to see from certain people HIDE their feeds.
It's Facebook, OP... you are making DRAMA out of Facebook... you know that, right?
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