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How to convince my wife to have kinky sex? And also suggest a MFM threesome?

Tagged as: Gay relationships, Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (25 February 2008) 5 Answers - (Newest, 19 July 2009)
A male United States age 26-29, *eremy690 writes:

OK here it goes. I would like to know what I can do to get my wife to have kinky sex. What I mean by that is I would like her to put on a strap-on on and screw my ass. There are other things i would like to do with her but she shuts me out everytime I ask if we can try. I am not gay but i would like to have a threesome with a guy or even group sex with other people. So I need to know what I can do with one of this problems but there is one more thing. I know that I am Bisexual but I dont know how to tell my wife. HELP!

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A male reader, Red Green 0289 United States +, writes (19 July 2009):

First, if this is a realy post (which I have my doubts), you can't convience your wife to do ANYTHING. You have to create a loving and safe relationship where the two of you can explore together. If you create a place where each of you can support the other in exploring their (not your) fantasies then great.

What you can't do is show up with a laundry list of activities and expect her to sign up.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (20 March 2008):

To duskyrowe not every gay or bi-sexual person has Aids HELLO!!!!

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A female reader, eyeswideopen United States +, writes (26 February 2008):

eyeswideopen agony auntOkay so what if you are Bi? Just because you are doesn't mean twice the sex, YOU married a woman, YOU decided to have sex only with her, forsaking all others. If you have sex with a man it's adultery just as much as a woman. YOU asked her to marry you. She obviously isn't into your kinky sex ideas. So you need to decide which is more important to you, sex with others or your marriage. She needs to know about your sexual orientation and maybe she'll make the decision for you.

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A female reader, red1982 United Kingdom +, writes (26 February 2008):

You are not going to be able to get your wife to do those things and she will be really upset that you are bi. But I would assume more upset that you didn't confide in her before you got married.

I think you need to have a long talk with your wife and decide where your future sits. You can't hide the fact that you are bi from her forever and she will be devastated if you cheat on her (or even just keep pressuring her into threesomes.) She will eventually sense that she is not enough for you and feel her self esteem slip away.

If you do love her you need to be honest even if it hurts.

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A female reader, duskyrowe United Kingdom +, writes (25 February 2008):

duskyrowe agony auntI am gonna be really old fashioned and say keep your threesome fantasies in your head and not make it become a reality. This can be a recipe for disaster in any relationship and can create problems. Have you ever had gay sex before? If so why did you get married in the first place and at such a young age.

Putting pressure on your wife to have kinky sex is not a good idea. If you do want to spice things up in the bedroom, then I suggest you sit down and have a talk and listen to what you guys have to say without putting any pressure on each other. I don't think telling your wife that you are bisexual is a good idea either, I thought the idea of marriage is to be faithful to each other.

If my man told me that he is Bi (which he is not BTW) I would be horrified and would demand he took an AIDS test as I would not want him to put my life in danger by having sex with men or women come to that.

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