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How should I go about finding a good intimate connection with the opposite sex

Tagged as: Dating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (5 September 2018) 2 Answers - (Newest, 6 September 2018)
A female United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

Two years ago I came to this site and I got some great advice on getting over my ex. I have since then focused on building myself up through affirmations - prayer - positive advice from people and trying to give back to society as a woman ( helping out the ones in need) and focusing on good..

It has been two years and now I am getting a bit antsy.. I am 32 so sotimetimes I do compare myself to my married friends that can’t atop showing off

Recently I joined a couple of dating sites again ( I tried them before and they only wanted sex) so I joined again and put a detailed profile - updated pics and tried to navigate again . I have found that all the men respond to my looks and want to meet right away - it feels like my job ( I am a recruiter) so I meet a lot of people through work but it feels transactional and repetitive... I can’t seem to connect with these men because they don’t seem to put effort into the convos to get to know me( one of them is also a married man in there) I found this out through simple googling

And to be honest since sex is important to me I often worry if I have sex with them online they might be on there looking for multiple partners

The whole process is exhausting and discouraging

Should I let this go? I am becoming antsy and also disappointed

How does one believe that soemthing will happen naturally - ? I am old fashioned to be honest and I prefer the old fashioned ways but unfortunately the men I have met in real life either have not been avaialbel( married) or I haven’t had any feeling..

I would like a physical and mental connection - I can’t seem to hit the jackpot on this ..

View related questions: married man, my ex

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (6 September 2018):

Honeypie agony auntMaybe you should TRY and meet men in a different way than dating sites?

I mean if all you get met with are men who doesn't seem interested in you as a person, just your looks... I think you are in the wrong "pond".

Maybe try some meetup events or even "group dates". And just attend them to meet new people and have fun NOT in hopes of finding your future husband.

Also, I have to ask then men that you ended up meeting up with - did they contact YOU or did you pick them? Because if they all contacted you... you need to change your game plan and do the picking and choosing.

If you belong to a church, see what "singles" event they host (if any).

And letting your friends know you are looking to date can also be a good idea, as they might know someone who could be a good fit.

Just go slow when meeting someone new. And WHEN you meet a guy in person and there is just ZERO interest or attraction, cut the "date" short and leave. WHY waste time on someone who isn't willing to invest a little energy, time and effort in getting to know you?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (6 September 2018):

But on your profile .. your old fashioned and that if they can't go slow .. they will go .. you know yourself and your worth the wait . It the can't value that ..then they move on mate .

And please no sex at all .. not even if your so heat up ..no no no .. get out and about also .. talk with them no phone sex either and see if that helps remember these people 're like strangers and that will feel odd

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