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How do you start a conversation about being ready for sex, when you're a virgin?

Tagged as: Sex, Virginity<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (19 November 2005) 3 Answers - (Newest, 23 November 2005)
A male , anonymous writes:

How do you bring up the topic of sex with your partner, when you are still a virgin? I have not been in a sexual relationship before and I do not know how to start, or how to ask? What's the best way, if both are ready? If both are comfortable with the idea how do you get things moving naturally, and not programmed?

Thanks

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A female reader, Maizey_J +, writes (23 November 2005):

You could also play that game. I dont know if you're old enough to drink, but u can do it with non alcoholic drinks too. One person says something they have never done. If the other person has then they drink some of their drink. Start off with statements like.... "I have never been to the zoo" etc as the game progresses the conversation changes. It is an easy way to get your feelings across. If this isn't your sort of thing then just talk to them. If they are weird about it then they wern't worth it. There are plenty of people who wouldnt mind at all.

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A male reader, Toddler 25 +, writes (20 November 2005):

Is he a virgin to? And does he know you are? You have to tell him at least, if not the first time will probably be a sad and unnecessarily painful experience for you. I once dated a girl who didnt tell, and our first time was completely ruined by it thus ruining the whole relationship in the early beginning.

I'd suggest you go on quite slowly, you should talk about what you want, and doing other sexual things is a good way to start (touching, maybe oral sex etc). If he is a virgin to I'd say its even more important that you do other things first, as most guys dont last very long at all until they have experience and would therefor bring you very little pleasure from just going right at it. I'm sure once you've started being sexual with each other (and remember to talk!) it will develop naturally. Take your time, no reason to hurry things. Being sexual is supposed to be good, and trust me there is a lot more pleasure in doing it slowly :-]

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A reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2005):

hes your b/f so bringing up the subject of sex shouldn't be that much of a big deal. He will appreciate it more if you tell him how you feel rather than bottle up all your feelings and not getting anywhere! Just remember if he agrees, be careful, use protection and most of all have fun!!

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