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How do you know if a guy wants to break up with you or not?

Tagged as: Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (18 October 2007) 6 Answers - (Newest, 14 September 2008)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, *pice writes:

How do you know if a guy wants to break up with you or not?? I have been seeing a guy for 3 months, we get to see eachother bout once a wk but lately this has become less and less and i feel that he has withdrawn from the relationship. We have up until now text eachother nearly every day with the odd exception here and there but again lately the text messages have become more infrequent and days have passed without me hearing from him. Fed up with his behaviour the other wk I didnt reply to his text for 5 days and made up an excuse that i had lost my phone (something he has done on 2 occasions to me) Things did not get much better and finally last wk I decided to text him to ask what was wrong, I told him i was concerned that he had lost interest and to let me know if he no longer wanted to see me. He replied with a sorry he hadnt been in touch and carried on chatting like i had mentioned nothing! since then he has only attempted to contact me twice and I have not recieved a text or call for a wk! Im so upset that he is treating me like this as we really do get on very well and unless I was imagining it are very attracted to eachother. He mentioned to my mates husband a few wks ago that i was the best girl he had ever met but he was scared of getting close to me as his ex wife cheated on him with his best friend. He wont talk to me about this and i dont want to push the issue. Do you think he is too much of a coward to tell me Im dumped or is this a mixed up guy who needs space to sort his head out? I dont want to text him again as I have already told him how I feel, but not knowing is really upsetting me.

View related questions: best friend, ex-wife, his ex, needs space, text

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A reader, anonymous, writes (14 September 2008):

Yea he sounds like a loser. Date and meet new people, if he comes back in your life great, if not u r better off. What does he do for work?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (9 April 2008):

He obviously has other "agendas" he's attending to. My advice to you is to date other guys. You and him are not in an established relationship so his responses should not bother you as much. You are waiting on him too much and when he doesn't call, you're getting upset. You're in the dating game. If he doesn't call for a week, and ignores your needs/feelings, that's a pretty obvious sign that he's losing interest, has other interests, or isn't interested anymore. You can definately do better and need to believe that you deserve better. Besides, do you really want to be with someone who treats you this way?

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A male reader, Danielepew Mexico +, writes (18 October 2007):

Danielepew agony auntI'm afraid he's too much of a coward to let you know you're dumped. As Dapone_1 says, his excuse is very lame. He's not worth your agony.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2007):

This is the kind of problematic man you want to avoid. Please don't get into this mess. This guy will go on in a relationship with you and will start with jealousy issues because "his ex wife cheated on him with his best friend". And you'll end up paying for his past issues.

My ex sickened me with his parents issues. "I won't let you talk to me like that because it reminds me of my the way my mother treats me"!, "My exgirlfriend used to say the same thing to me and I won't let you manipulate me like that". The guy was nuts.

Try to avoid men with emotional baggage.

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A female reader, ladysuzanna Canada +, writes (18 October 2007):

ladysuzanna agony auntyou have only know him for three months the guy problem knows you care very much about him so if the placing else where he knows you will forgive him he does not think of you find someone that does not loose there phone and treat you like a lady it will hurt for a little while but someone else will come alone better don't text him back let your heart mend and you well see the sun again good luck

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A male reader, dapone 1 United Kingdom +, writes (18 October 2007):

dapone 1 agony auntdear spice

i really do not want to burst you bubble, but i think this guy is using you,the lamest reason i have ever heard is, 'I DO NOT WANT TO GET TO CLOSE BECAUSE MY WIFE CHEATED ON ME' your not his wife, why did he not make it clear to you three months a go that his wife did this, i think he is not man enough to come straight out and tell you the truth instead of letting you hang around waiting for him, three month is not long enough to really get to now some one,and i am sorry that he has let you down,what type of person would get your hope up this way, then suddenly let you go like this,you are better off without this person in your life, you need the care and love we all seek, some one who will be kind and loving, some one who will respect you because you do not deserve a person like this holding you back, from finding the real true love of your life, when he stopped txt you and phoning you less and less that is a sigh that he has lost interest, please do your self some good walk away from this mess, pull yourself together, get over him and find the person you really deserve in your life, and the person who really deserve to be with you.

good luck and be happy.

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