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female
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*eslieGirl
writes: HiI have been in a relationship with a married man for the past 7 months since june of 2005. I met him online when I was living in Cheyenne Wy. He did not disclose to me up front that he was married and he did not tell me until after 3 days I had been here in in Washington. We fell in love with each other and he has me waiting and waiting promising me that he is getting a Divorce as his marriage is like a brother sister type. He will not allow me to date or see other men and he expects me to remain at home alone and not have a fullfilled relationship with a single man. I met a single man and we have been dating secretly behind his back for the past month. This single guy told me today that he loves me and wants to commit to me in a full time relationship as I will have him for me and someone to love and sleep and wake up with. The problem is that I am still in love with this married man and I know I need to break free and commit to the single guy. How do I break free of this emotional bond? He has promised me that he will be getting a Divorce within the next 4 weeks and for me to wait on him. the loneliness that he has put me through has taken it's toll on me and caused him and me to argue constantly. It has developed into an unhappy relationship as I can't do this injustice to the single guy that wants me. He knows of this relationship of mine with the married man and he too, is waiting patiently for me to walk away from the married man. Please, Please, help me walk away and get my life back and for me to be happy with a single guy, so I can put this mess behing me. I know that I am wasting my life and time with this married man.ThanxLeslieGirl
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2006): Hi!I have left my married lover and the single guy that is pursing me, I am moving him in. the married lover and me talked yesterday and we both have come to realize that this is a dead end relationship, he will never leave his wife, we will never sleep together, he will never commit to me. With the single guy, we get to sleep together, live together, 24/7 full time relationship. The married lover and I have both decided today that we have ended it all and he has returned full time to his wife.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2006): I came on this board to ask what advices can be given to continue to be strong after you leave your married man for the who know's how many times at this point. However, reading you post and the replies - it made it clear to just find your life again - A life with a married man is so depreciating, addictive, sad and just letting go the conquering issues. I do hope with my married Lover, that he really does get what he deserves, which he might already. A sad marriage and a life that just makes him old..I do want to let go of my anger. But with you Leslie, it's only been 7 months and thank god you found someone who just might help you get over this interruption of your life! Good Luck -
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male
reader, malaysianfeet +, writes (25 January 2006):
Change the locks. Dont do routine stuff for a couple of months. He cant keep track. He'll tire. But be cautious. He sounds weird.
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female
reader, LeslieGirl +, writes (21 January 2006):
LeslieGirl is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI am terminating my relationship with this married man and moving on with my life. He does not want me to leave him and find a single loving caring man that I could have in a 24/7 relationship. He is very controlling and I am going against his wishes. I am considering leaving town in the late night hours and dissapear. He told me today that he is obssessed with me and it won't go away.
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female
reader, LeslieGirl +, writes (15 January 2006):
LeslieGirl is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi Dawnest!
I do find myself all alone on the Holidays and this past Christmas he called me to tell me what a wonderful time he was having and it made me jealous and I felt bad from it. And last night he called to tell me that he and his wife are having a fancy Dinner with wine together. He expects me to live here in my Condo all alone and forbids me to see anyone or have someone stay with me. I have to stay on edge waiting for his call and I can't plan anything to do for myself. There is the option of me and my new boyfriend to move into another place in the town he lives in.
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female
reader, Dawnest +, writes (15 January 2006):
Easy! You open your mind and realise that married lover will never give up his comfy life with boring wife just to make you his new partner. You're wasting a perfectly good life linked to a married man. Im sure you've spent endless holidays and weekends on your own getting comfort from a hurried phone call.
Make your play for the boyfriend who seems to adore and want to make you a happy bunny. Surely that is worth more than tears and heartache and all the broken promises you get from your married lover.
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female
reader, LeslieGirl +, writes (15 January 2006):
LeslieGirl is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi Again!!!!!
Yes, my plate is full. I will be having some emotional stuff to go through and breaking the emotional bond. It will be very difficult but I'm not happy like this. I keep believing his promises that he will leave his wife. I have some doubts too about that and besides, I need to have some willpower.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 January 2006): Dear LesliegirlHi again!I'm wishing you all the best! I'm glad I could give you some perspective on things. Sounds like you have a good thing going with you current BF. I hope it won't be WW3, but your plate is definatley full.Best wishes once again!
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female
reader, LeslieGirl +, writes (15 January 2006):
LeslieGirl is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi
Thanx so much for your response. I really appreciate it. He has been married for 36 years and has 2 grown sons that are also married. The married guy is leaving town for a week's vacation, and when he does, I'm moving in my boyfriend. So when married guy returns to town to visit me and finds my new boyfriend, it will be World War 3.Anyway, boyfriend is moving in. Yes, married guy wants me to put my life on hold for him. I can't really deal with that. It is selfish and inconsiderate of him.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 January 2006): Dear Lesliegirl,Stay with your BF you are seeing now. You may be thinking the married man is Mr. Right, but I would definately stay with Mr. Right Now!You are doing the right thing hun. Walk away from this married man who is a "cheater!" If he does leave his wife for you he is going to bring all of his excess baggage with him.(I have my doubts that he is going to leave her anyway.) How long has he been married? Are there children involved? Do you really want the reputation of being the "other woman?" You are already off to a bad start with him anyhow, with all the arguing going on about him making you wait. Then to have the nerve to tell you to put the rest of your life on hold? Sounds like a control freak to me!Don't waste anymore of your time on this man! Stay with your current BF who obviously adores you enough to be standing beside you, and wait if he must, during all that you are going through! This speaks volumes!Best Wishes
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