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How do I tell my girlfriend that I'd like her to be my first sex partner?

Tagged as: Dating, Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (16 June 2017) 6 Answers - (Newest, 23 June 2017)
A male United States age 18-21, anonymous writes:

I have been dating my girlfriend for 5 months now. I’m defiantly into her. We do a lot of fun things together. I have not had sex yet. She has told me that she has. I would like her to be my first sex partner. I think she is smart, cute, beautiful, and sexy. How do I tell her that I would like her to be my first sex partner? I would like to see her naked and think sex would be fun, creative, and beautiful with her. If we do have sex when is a good time for sex?

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland + , writes (23 June 2017):

aunt honesty agony auntI wouldn't ask her directly. If you have been in a relationship for five months have you done anything sexual? Kiss? Flirt? Touch? Just take it to the next level and see if she responds.

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A male reader, Capri2 Argentina +, writes (18 June 2017):

Well, probably you want to wait a little longer before you ask a direct question. Because after five month you could definitely ask her for sex. But then she could say no. And how will you feel if she says no. Even if she says not right now?

Let me tell you: if she rejects you, you will most probably be mad at her. Because she already had sex with other guy (or guys). And you will feel that she doesn't find you as attractive as the other guy. I mean, that's only human. And maybe she has her reasons. But that won't make you feel better.

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A male reader, WiseOwlE United States + , writes (17 June 2017):

When she's ready, that will happen. If it hasn't come-up, it's because she isn't. She has had sex before; which has given her some insight as to how guys sometimes change once they get it.

So if she has consistently dated you for this long, she is expecting sex to become a part of it. She may be avoiding that subject for her own reasons. You can ask if she likes you enough to go the next step. If she prefers to wait a little longer, respect that.

When that time comes, please have safe-sex and use condoms. Don't expect her to always deliver when you want it.

If she says no, SHE MEANS, NO!!!

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (16 June 2017):

Honeypie agony auntYou seem quite capable of expressing yourself in a good way so WHY not just tell her like you told us?

If you are ready to have sex, tell her and let HER decide when and where?

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A female reader, liveasyoudream Netherlands +, writes (16 June 2017):

Talk to her! This all sounds good to me :-).

Check in with yourself and with her what feels good for you both, and know that things are allowed to be Fun.

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A female reader, Andie's Thoughts United Kingdom + , writes (16 June 2017):

Andie's Thoughts agony auntYou wait until it feels like the right time. If you're making out, put your hand on her leg and see what she does. It's odd to just blurt it out if you're not doing anything romantic.

There's no rush, OP. Make sure you have condoms, though. Do not have unprotected sex, no matter what.

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